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4 Scriptures to Read While Waiting On God

co-authored by Culus Williams
 
God has released promises into each of our lives. The funny thing is that God releases the promise but he never tells us the process that we will go through to receive the promise. Usually, we start out excited about the promises of God but as we begin to go through the process, we grow weary.
We start to give up and even want to throw in the towel. We become angry with those around us because we feel that they just don’t understand our challenge. We isolate ourselves from fellowship with others because we don’t want them to see the pain in our eyes. Some of us even become angry with God and wonder why he is allowing this happen.
Here are a few scriptures to help you get through your waiting season:
Feel Like Giving Up
Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Angry with Loved Ones
James 1:20 “because human anger does not produce righteousness that God desires.
Isolation From Fellowship
Proverbs 18:1 “Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.”
Angry with God
1 John 5:14 “This is the confidence we have in approaching God; that if we ask anything according to his
will, he hears us.”
 
Adversity tends to come when we least expect it. It’s not easy being challenged by God. It’s not easy not knowing how long you will go through the process.
We encourage you to keep trusting God no matter what it looks like in your life. We often look at things through the natural eye but when you’re being tested it’s best that you look at things through the spiritual eye. Walking by faith and not be sight means that you’re putting your faith in Jesus so you are looking to Jesus no matter what it looks like in the natural. (2 Corinthians 5:7)
Stop trusting man to fix it and trust God that it’s already done. If he released a promise into your life, he is going to fulfill the promise. Don’t give up and don’t give out. When God releases the promise it will be so worth the wait. You will know that only God did it for you. God will get all the glory, honor and praise that he deserves.
 

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6 Steps to Turning Your Mundane Season Into a Purposeful Season

Seasons are a big part of my home state’s identity. Minnesota has four distinct seasons, each with its own set of unique characteristics and qualities.
Right now, it’s Summer. Summer in Minnesota is HOT. Just because we’re always portrayed as lumberjacks toughing out the bitter cold doesn’t mean it’s always below zero. Today was a particularly humid, hot summer day and I found myself longing for fall.
I stopped myself in the middle of my thought, realizing how silly this was.
If it was already Fall, that would mean I’d be going back to school already (I’m a teacher). I would have missed out on lake days, camping, flexibility in my schedule, traveling, and bonfires. Now sure, Fall has a lot to look forward to, but Fall is not Summer. They are separately wonderful, and each also carry their own difficulties as well.
I couldn’t help but compare this to our life stories. We are constantly going through different seasons, and each season has its own joys and hardships. I’ve found that the key is not to make it through a certain season in order to get to a ‘better’ one, but to change your focal point so that you can find contentment in each season throughout your life.
Here are some steps that I’ve taken to enjoy my current season of life.
1. Recognize the season you’re in.
Maybe you’re in a season of being newly married. Maybe you’re in a season of being single. Maybe you’re in a season of starting a family. It sounds simple, but this is an extremely important step. Without acknowledging it, it’s easy to get caught up in comparing your life to others’. Comparing your life to another’s can cause tension and destruction in the destinies of each person involved. Recognize your season, then believe that your season is just as important as another’s.
2. Discover the purpose of your season.
Big or small, this is what will allow you to thrive during this time. Ask the Lord to reveal what your purpose is and trust that He will give you an answer at some point. If you feel confused, be patient and faithful. I’ve found that sometimes I don’t fully understand a purpose in a season until it’s over, but it’s a big relief when I can look back and feel confident that I remained faithful and at peace throughout the process.
3. Make a list of activities you can only do in this season.
I can’t, or maybe the right word is shouldn’t, go swimming in a Minnesota lake in December. I can’t go downhill skiing in August. I won’t see leaves turn color in February. You get the point. There will be really great opportunities in every season, and not all of them will be available every season of your life. Take advantage of them before it’s too late.
4. Find people to connect with who are in similar seasons.
I’m not saying you need to spend all of your time with these type of people. But having someone, or several people who are in a similar season will provide an outlet when you need to talk through issues that may arise. This is not to say others won’t be able to offer any insight, but there is something really comforting about a person who can identify with specific emotions and experiences.
5. Find people who were in your season but aren’t anymore.
They will be able to provide wisdom and counsel into what you are experiencing. This type of relationship could also end up being valuable encouragement and restore hope within you!
6. Don’t give up.
A new season is bound to come along! Galatians 6:9 – “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.” If you feel overwhelmed by what’s currently happening in your season, just keep doing your best each day! His mercies are new every morning. Worrying about what will happen in the future only uses up the mercy that you received for the day.
There might not be a way to ensure that trials and difficulties aren’t a part of our lives, but there are ways to navigate through them. Being intentional about how we treat each season will allow us to find value in our experiences – whether they seem positive or negative at the time.
With that, cheers to our unique seasons and discovering our purposes in them!

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You Robbed Me: A Story of God's Healing Love After Being Raped

Guest Writer: Lauren Anderson
This is the first time I am opening up about my rape two years ago. After it happened, I quickly moved on and “didn’t let it bother me.” But, recently life kind of slap me in the face and I ran into the guy who drugged me and raped me two years ago.
I wasn’t aware of the effects it had on me until I had to re-face the situation. I was traumatized all over again. PTSD does not just happen in war, and it was something I truly had to take the time to walk though.
As I write this post, I know most of you don’t know me, but some of you may. I want my story to be heard because of the beauty that has come out of it. I have felt alone because of this experience and I never really knew how to process it all, or truly heal from it. Today I read this poem to my Counselor, who had me write this to the guy who raped me. For the first time, I felt the healing from the power of what God’s LOVE has truly done through the situation.
No matter what you’ve been through, faith is all you need to get through it….faith that God is GOOD. Truly living by faith and not by sight. We have a choice to live in despair as a victim, or with faith as a conqueror. I chose faith and most of the time it wasn’t easy. But…no matter what you’re facing…..I pray you keep faith. I will never try to understand God, because I know I can’t. My “why’s” may never be answered, but I probably wouldn’t understand them now anyways. So, here it is…….my raw emotions displayed for you to see. A part of who I am.
__________________________________________

You Robbed Me……
When a robber breaks into your house, they invade your space, they go where they don’t belong.
A place you considered to be safe and comforting, the place you called Home.
They go in with the intention of taking something of value, something that is not theirs.
You Robbed Me.
You took the comfort and safety out of the very home that I live and breathe in.
You invaded my space and who I am.
You changed me.
Because of you I am different, I see differently, and I feel differently.
I did not invite you in to change me and to take value, but you took without thinking.
You took without considering the true value of what you were taking.
…..a part of ME
A part of me that someone else will want “to have and to hold,”
A part of me that requires trust and time…..You just took it.
I may not remember it and I don’t have memories to haunt me, but I feel the void.
In the very core of who I am I know what you took, and THAT haunts me.
It haunts me in a way that I feel at fault, that I should have done something more to stop you.
That I was the one who was wrong.
That I should have seen you coming.
But no…you came in the darkness of the night…my unconsciousness.
Waking up and knowing something was different, knowing what you did and my body was unable to stop it.
You took away my control of the sole thing I thought I may have real control over in this world….myself.
You took beauty and replaced it with filth.
You took light and replaced it with darkness.
You took confidence and left insecurities.
You took romance and left doubt.
You took faith and trust and left me with question.
You left me with a scar that I have to know is within me the rest of my life. A scar that is not visible, but felt. Felt in the very inner part of me.
You will never know, or even give it another thought.
You took and yet got nothing.
You took a part of me….A part of me you never even knew.
BUT
Here’s the Beauty in the Midst of Darkness.
You also GAVE me something.
You took what no man can replace yes, but you gave me reason to search.
You gave me a situation to overcome.
You gave me darkness so I could truly search for light.
You gave me questions so I could truly search for who I really am.
You gave me something I could never overcome alone….and though you made me feel alone…I now know I am not….and never was.
You gave me a rock bottom so I could know who was the rock at my bottom.
WHY?…………because I have a God who turns ashes into Beauty.
 
About the Guest Contributing Writer: My name is Lauren Anderson and I am currently working towards my Masters Degree in Counseling at Dallas Baptist University. I am passionate about helping people and this has only grown by walking through my own traumatic experiences of being raped two years ago. It’s nothing you see coming as is true with every traumatic event and is nothing you can be prepared for. It’s been a long journey but God has shown me more about him and myself than I could ever ask for. You are never alone.

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Engaged Marriage

The One Thing Your Spouse May Never Ask For, But Really Needs From You

Two weeks ago I again had the privilege of watching my husband read one of his books to a group of preschoolers. In the days leading up to the event, I honestly believe I was more excited than he was. I reminisced about the first time we met in Central Park and how timid he seemed when he presented his first book to me. Now, seven books later, and he is proudly showing the world his talent.
Watching his growth and seeing his abilities blossom is a true inspiration to me. Even when he doesn’t have confidence in himself, I have confidence in him, and he always has confidence in me.
It is your duty as a spouse to be able to love and support your significant other regardless of what happens. The fact is, when the two of you come together for one purpose, you are less likely to fail.  Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 says, “9 Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. 11 Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? 12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer.”
Even if you don’t think you have anything to lend to your spouse’s gift or ministry, having a cheerleader, a counselor, and a friend is important and vital to the success of your spouse. Unfortunately, if they can’t find that in you, they may be tempted to find it in someone else. I am not saying they will cheat (emotionally or physically), but they can begin to confide and put their trust in someone else with their gift for the sake of affirmation and support.
Your spouse’s gift was given to them by God, which means that it is a part of who they are. In other words, when you married him/her, you agreed to love and cherish that gift.  Colossians 2:2 says, “I want them to be encouraged and knit together by strong ties of love.” In this scripture, Paul was speaking to the church of Colosse in regards to the church of Laodicea and other believers. If it is important for the body of Christ to be knit together, how much more important is it that you are knit together in your marriage?
You need to be melded together in all aspects of your life including your hopes and dreams. Your hopes and dreams, as well as your spouse’s, speaks to the inheritance that you will leave for future generations. Don’t be responsible for the shortage of an inheritance because of your lack of encouragement.
Be the reason your spouse pushes on through all of the hurts and falls. Remember that each of us has a purpose and because you and your spouse are connected by the rib, your spouse’s purpose is also a part of your purpose. Don’t allow your negativity and lack of enthusiasm to stop you or your spouse from fulfilling their purpose.
 
 

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Why You Should Stop Waiting?

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Why You Should Stop Waiting?

It seems like the dawn of day will never come, well at least with me it does when the agonizing diminishing minutes of waiting in the Starbucks line drag on for what seems like an eternity. You scroll through the news feed, you check your Instagram, you take a selfie or two (don’t even try to deny that you haven’t done this its just sad) and sweetly jam to whatever blasts its way into the speakers of your car. Waiting.
Then you finally reach the glorious window to grab the drink you just felt like you went through a marathon of tribulation to get! It tastes just as good as you thought it would and you realize you carried on with life in the waiting. You continued to be. The drink came just like you knew it would without a second thought. And all the while you carried on living life in its entirety because of one great assurance; the reward for the wait would be there in the end.
Now I know that is an infinitely grand symbolism to relate the relationship woes of singles to the steamed Starbucks lattes we savor, but stay with me I promise I’ll whip up a delight for you in the end.
WAITING
Webster’s states the word waiting as a period of time spent inactive or stationary. For many singles the ideology behind being in the season of waiting means being inactive or dormant to life. We should just await the arrival of his or her significant other, or the the next season of life when in reality Jesus came to “give life and life more abundantly.” Jesus didn’t sacrifice himself in hopes that during the “waiting” season of our lives we would expel ourself from living it.
In 2 Peter 1:2 it states, “Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God.” God wants us to have peace in the grace of the season He has us in. When we are celebrating in the season of our singleness He means for us to stop waiting in the literal since of giving up life and wait in the beauty of His assurance, the assurance of the great reward awaiting in the end of our season.Whether that is moving into a new season of singleness, a new relationship, a new place to live etc. When we stop looking to the next season to make life better and start seeing Jesus for all He has and is in the now. We settle in the peace of the grace of the present. 
SEEING SINGLENESS
Singleness is to be lived. Not waited out in agony of finally being done like a math test or credit card application. Singleness isn’t about the pursuit of “finding the one.” Singleness is to be savored like a Starbucks frappe on a hot day. It’s to be lived in its fullness to grasp the great grace; knowledge and truth the Lord wants to extend to us.
When the choice to choose forever with the right person does come, (if marriage is even the end result for what God has for you) that its viewed through a season which was lived out in love and light not one waited out in disillusion and depression.
Singleness isn’t to be viewed with bitterness and sarcasm such as, “All good things come to those who wait”, I sure hope so because if I’m waiting for bad this is going to suck. “Why are you still single”, because becoming a magician was taken? Singleness should be a place on the journey where books are read, road trips are made at midnight, community is at your core, relationships with sisters or brothers in Christ are deepened, laughter is abundantly more, where dreams are drawn up and accomplished by the droves. Stop waiting for life to start or force people into a place which hasn’t yet been established for them in your life because you are so tired and exhausted of the process we’ve deemed waiting.
STOP WAITING
Hear me out please, I am not saying throw in the towel and go completely off the cliff of your foundations and cornerstone of standards. I am saying though stop claiming singleness as a dead, dormant dry season meant to be the end of all ends until you get to the mountain top. Instead change the viewpoint of singleness to be lived out not waited out. Let life be enjoyed, let God become more savored and let love most of all nourish and grow in the living out of the waiting.
“I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully? Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Ephesians 3:16-19
This verse to me is the motto us as singles should be holding onto in a season where Christ longs to make His home in our hearts and bring us to trusting in Him even more for filling the space where our future mate will capture one day. But in the mean time letting God’s love grow deep in us to keep us faithful and strong. And this is the very best part so we can have fullness of life! A season of waiting isn’t death. It wasn’t meant to wait out with dread and expectations of lack. It is meant to be lived in the fullness of life, to be enjoyed to the utmost all the while increasing our faith and hope in the assurance of the end result that God is ever faithful in His promises to us!

 If we are just waiting to wait out the waiting we are waiting our life to death.

And when we finally start living the waiting fades in time and we soon realize the reward came just at the perfect time and we arrive to the window of goodness, exceedingly abundantly more than we could ask or imagine. A future full of promise and the reward of all that our sweet heavenly Father promised us. And it just so happens to beat out a good Starbucks drink any day. Don’t you think?
 
Written By: Angela Groce

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Dating/Courting Engaged Home

Set the Foundation for Love with Honesty

My husband and I met in person at Central Park. Our business conversation quickly turned into a conversation about everything else. As he walked me to the train (after his attempt to kiss me) he stared at every movement my large lips made. I kindly asked him not to do that because it made me uncomfortable as most full-liped ladies would know. Now that I think back to that encounter, I wonder if he was looking at my lips or mesmerized by the things I said to him.
As I said in a previous article, he told me he loved me just days after meeting me. Thinking back now, I know that we were at the most vulnerable points in our lives and were able to be honest. Honesty is most important when trying to develop a relationship with someone. It is even more important than having things in common and spending quality time. It’s definitely more important than playing the so-called game of “trapping the man.”
We’ve all done it: try to find ways to get him to put a ring on it. But it is impossible to make him want you if you aren’t being yourself. The best way to show him who you really are is by the words you use. Don’t be afraid to voice what you are looking for in a relationship. You don’t want to run him off with your long list of demands but be candid about the type of relationship that you want. Make sure that you are clear that you want a monogamous relationship that can possibly lead to marriage. Why waste time? In the past, I’ve told guys that I just want to keep it casual when I really wanted to say, “I want to have your babies.” Although, God allowed me to be fearless enough to say that to my husband on our first date, I could have kept that to myself. The thing that I did let him know, which was the right thing to do was that I was tired of mindlessly dating. Yes, I was young (20) but I was tired of having a broken heart. I made sure to let God know and let him know.
I was honest but I wasn’t demanding—not at first anyway. I simply explained to the man I knew I wanted to marry, that I don’t casually date and that I hoped that the next man I was monogamous with was going to be the last person that I was with. I assured him that I was not pressuring him into anything but I wanted to be open with him. I didn’t want to date him under false pretenses and I didn’t want him to do that to me either. He appreciated my honesty and felt like he could be honest as well. It turned out that he was tired of just dating too. He was actually considering marrying someone else if he didn’t meet the right one by age 30. He appreciated that he met me before he made the mistake of marrying the wrong one.
Though it may be early in a relationship consider that the early days are your building days. These are the days that you are constructing the foundation for a long-lasting love. Love can only exist in an honest place. Its foundations must be biblical in order to thrive. The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.” (Proverbs 18:21) You have the power to speak life into your relationship by being honest so be mindful of the words that you speak to your potential spouse. Also, be careful not to be demanding; that is a good way to run him off. Don’t think that as soon as you talk about your intentions for your future that you should start planning your wedding. “4Love is patient and kind…6 It does not demand its own way.” (1 Corinthians 13:4-6) It just means that you’re not wasting anymore time in relationships that aren’t going in the right direction.

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Dating/Courting Home Marriage

Let Your Husband Find You: Part 2

In the previous article, I described some tips a pastor gave to find (or not find) a husband.

  • Let your husband find you.
  • Make a list of all of the things you want in a husband.
  • Trust the word that God gives you.

I followed these steps and my husband of almost four years has every quality I desired from height to ethnicity to personality.
When I heard the sermon I was only 19 and the story seemed far fetched but I was so desperate for relief that I was ready to try anything. I must have sat in that bath tub for more than two hours listing all of the things I desired and trying to be honest with myself and God. There were many times that I said what I thought I wanted and then had to mentally erase these so-called qualities that have gotten me in trouble in the past. After praying, I sat silently, waiting for God to speak to me. It wasn’t long before I heard a quiet voice tell me that I will meet my husband in a year and six months after, I would be married. He said that the devil will send people in my way but not to get distracted.
The very next day, I met a Packaging Designer for Fisher Price. He was sexy, strong, had money and was a little mysterious, every girl’s superficial dream. I tried to turn him into the man I asked for but in the end, I realized he was like every other “man” I dated: selfish and abusive. Even with that experience, I still tried to force three more relationships, including one with my ex…and his baby….and his baby-mama and each were utter failures. June 2010, a year after my prayer, I decided that I wasn’t going to get married; I’d just focus on my writing career. The next week, I met Robert Crewe. His best friend introduced us because we were both writers. We spoke everyday for three days before we actually met. I was convinced that we were going to be friends at most. Three days after meeting him, while on our first date, we stood at the Promenade Downtown Brooklyn (New York).
I said to him, “There’s something that I want to say but I’m afraid to say it.”
He said, “I want to say it too.”
Instead I told him, “I want a daughter with your eyes.”
Three years later, I gave birth to Jael Octavia Crewe, a beautiful little girl with daddy’s eyes and mommy’s nose.
There are no words to explain God’s miracles but I want you to know that you can and will experience them. I was a woman with very little faith in what God spoke into my life but I always kept it in the back of my mind because I knew that maybe, one day, it would be true. Everything He spoke into my life has happened thus far. Even though I had naysayers, including my spiritual counselor, I held on to God’s blessing. As we move toward a new year, I want you to sit down with God and discuss your future. Don’t be afraid to claim your destiny and declare your victory.
Revelation 21:6-7New Living Translation (NLT)
6 And he also said, “It is finished! I am the Alpha and the Omega—the Beginning and the End. To all who are thirsty I will give freely from the springs of the water of life. 7 All who are victorious will inherit all these blessings, and I will be their God, and they will be my children.

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Marriage Parenting

How to be Inspired When "Life" Leaves You Inspiration-less

Life Happens
What do you do when “life” happens and you become so consumed by your day to day activities that you have succumbed to routine and complacency? Your day is full from the moment that your alarm clock sounds or your children stand over your sleeping body asking for cereal.
You spend your day chauffeuring these pint sized people to and from school and to and from after school activities. You shop for groceries, put away the groceries, and then cook the groceries. Between doing laundry and cleaning the house, you somehow manage to squeeze in a cup of coffee and maybe a meal for yourself. For some all of this has to be juggled around a full work schedule. 
In the midst of all of these things, you don’t even realize that have lost your inspiration, the thing that you love to do, the things that gives you that breath of fresh air. Somehow that which gives you life and purpose amongst your “must do’s” has managed to take a back seat so far back that you don’t even remember what it felt like embrace it, wooed by it, inspired by it.
What do you do then?
How do you get back to a place where you are not running on autopilot, but on the inside your heart is smiling with anticipation of doing that one thing that makes you happy? 
What is it that you have neglected in your unintentional pursuit of ordinary?
Maybe you a writer with no time to put pen to paper or a photographer who hasn’t been able to see the beauty of nature because of traffic. Perhaps you are musician but life is so cluttered that you would rather sit in silence during your down time than pick up your instrument. No matter what your “thing” is, it’s yours, it’s part of who you are, and it deserves your attention too. 
5 Tips to get your inspiration back

  • 1. A Vision Board is a great way to remind yourself visually of things that you love. What to put on your vision board: Pictures from a magazine, quotes, or cards, hand written notes or doodles that inspire you. Put the vision board someplace that you will see it often throughout your day
  • 2. Think back to the last time that you felt inspired. Where were you? What were you doing? Now think about what has changed since then. If the change can be altered so that it’s not an “inspiration killer” make the necessary changes. If the changes are a necessity, find ways to accommodate those changes in other ways; maybe at different times of the day or on different days all together. 
  • 3. Join a group or take a class. If you love to cook, take a cooking class. If you are a writer join a book club and allow someone else’s work provoke you to writing again. 
  • 4. Go somewhere and be still. There are times when our minds are so busy thinking of everything and everyone else that we neglect our own wants and desires. Take a drive, sit on the beach, find a place away from the noise and routine to be alone. Let the scenery and the silence inspire you.
  • Just do it. Sometimes the only thing that will get you going again is just to do it. Push past how you feel and just do it. Make time in your schedule and just do it. It may be hard but it will jump start you again.

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Engaged Marriage

5 Guaranteed Ways to Get the Most Out of Your Spouse

When reading the title of this blog, I am sure it is guaranteed to raise eyebrows. Well, allow me to explain. After being married for 8 years, I have learned a lot from doing marriage my way or the way I was taught by my parents or lack thereof.
Once we exchange rings and the fanfare is over, we become quickly acquainted with the ‘real’ person you married. Don’t get me wrong! I am quite sure many of you know a lot about your spouse prior to saying ‘I Do’.
However, I am pretty sure you find out a lot more once you are living together as a married couple. Maybe you didn’t know he was lazy or maybe you didn’t know she was terrible with money. Well,  I have developed a few techniques that will help you get the most out of your spouse.

  1. Assess his/her weaknesses – I am sure that after you left the honeymoon and moved in you are beginning to notice behaviors or weaknesses in your spouse. The areas that your spouse is weak in offer to assist in those areas.
  2. Pray for Development – Ask God to teach you to pray for your spouse. After all, God is her Father and he knows the way to her heart better than you. Trust his guidance as you pray for your spouse. You are her biggest intercessor. Pray that she grows in these areas of her life.
  3. Affirmation – Be sure to affirm the areas they are strong in.
  4. Handling their mistakes – Be patient when they makes mistakes. Use these as opportunities to demonstrate to your spouse that you want to help and that they don’t have to do it alone. Also, don’t forget to encourage them to try again.
  5. Develop a vision for your spouse – What do you want to see materialize in his/her life, career, spiritual life. Once you get a vision for your spouse, invest in it! Purchase books! Give them training ideas! Lend you ear to your spouse passions and seek out ways to fulfill them!

Finally, MOTIVATE, MOTIVATE, MOTIVATE!
There is much power in a praying, comforting, reassuring spouse. The end result is a spouse that has the courage to tackle every challenge. As she sees you going out of your way for her. She will go out of her way for you!

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5 Must Do's When Stress is Getting Real