Tag: husband

Categories
Communication Home Marriage Physical Intimacy Spiritual Intimacy

3 Prayers to Become A Better Wife

Young girl praying in nature by the Sea

When I first got married 9 years ago, I learned the value of the pursuit of prayer dealing with circumstances we faced and disagreements we had. I was taught in church how the Lord wants to be included in every aspect of our lives. He desires for us to talk to Him and pray about everything. Nothing is too small or too big for the Lord because He’s always listening. But as He listens, He wants the conversation to be a two-way connection. He talks, you listen. You talk, He listens (1 John 5:14-15).
So I did just that in my prayer time. However, I would often spend time praying and talking to God, seeing no change to the challenges we were having. I remember one day crying out to God saying, “Do you hear me, God, are you listening?” I struggled with knowing if God actually heard me and played the blame game with my husband because I felt he needed to change more than I did. One day, while in a Christian bookstore, I spotted a CD series entitled, “Wife after God: Drawing Closer to God & Your Husband.” From that moment, my life drastically changed in how I approached God in prayer.
I learned that praying for my husband meant God was changing me! I was getting caught up in all the things that I wanted God to change about him, when all God was speaking back to me was about me. What a reality check! As I continued to pray and listen to the CD series, seeds were planted that came against everything that I thought was wrong in my marriage. As I began to apply the principles I learned, changes happened because I developed a heart after God and a heart of compassion for our marriage (Psalm 32:8). One dramatic change from my prayers was I learned (and I am still learning) how to be a better wife for my husband.
Here are 3 things I learned to pray for to become a better wife:

  1. To serve and honor my husband well: I learned that loyalty is sometimes demonstrated in marital challenges. As I prayed, God shared that difficult times were what He was using to cultivate the depth of my commitment to Him and my husband. My demonstration of loyalty, affirmation, genuine love, and a servant’s heart allowed me to grow in godly character towards my husband (Philippians 2:1-4).
  1. To think before you speak: Proverbs 21:23 offers some good advice: “Watch your words and hold your tongue; you’ll save yourself a lot of grief.” I learned to ask God when I prayed to give me the best time to talk with my husband and the right tone when communicating with him.
  1. To set aside time for each other: Praying about our quality time taught me to be intentional with our special times together. Date nights could be watching Netflix together, taking walks, or having game nights. Remember, the most important thing is to strengthen your love connection and be creative!

A happy marriage is worth the effort of allowing God to help you become a better mate for your husband or wife. What prayers could you pray to strengthen your marriage?
 

Categories
Marriage

My Husband Needs Help

719630

by Cassandra Bolar
No, my husband doesn’t possess any fatal flaws or defective personality traits – as a matter of fact, he is the most encouraging, appreciative, ambitious and loving man I know.  However, one day I had an epiphany that my husband needs some help, major help.  I realized this help wouldn’t require seeking a professional counselor or spending a dime.
 I came to the realization that my husband needs MY help, support, love and encouragement more than anyone else’s.  
 
This lightbulb went off when he was in the throes of preparing to launch his own business…
Without his prompting, I recognized that he would need my help in a very practical, hands-on manner.  I also realized that I have unique attributes and talents that would help him in the areas he would need the most assistance.  The hardest part of the realization was understanding the action that would be required of me; namely, making changes in my own life to fulfill this important role.  I had been so accustomed to doing my own thing that adjusting my life in major ways to support and help my husband seemed like a sacrifice that was too big for me.  I’d spent my entire life specializing in making my own dreams and aspirations come true, and I needed to make an important shift now that I was married (I’m a newlywed of two years).
I had to do some critical soul searching and figure out God’s wisdom on my role as a wife and how his insight should guide me in providing the help and support my husband needs.  Slowly but surely, my heart softened and eventually fully embraced the idea of providing the help my husband needs – regardless of the changes that are required of me.  I started to delight myself in supporting his dreams in major ways.  
 
The first step of this journey was clearly defining what it means to be a wife and using God’s wisdom on the topic.  
Then, “helpmeet” stood out to me.  Now, the English version, “helpmeet”, doesn’t quite give justice to the depth and significance of being a wife.  The Hebrew version of “helpmeet” is ezer (strength/power/rescue) kenegdo (alongside/counterpart), which better illustrates the beauty of being an equal partner with your husband and a source of strength and encouragement.
 For example, ezer was referenced in the bible during the times when people desperately needed the Lord’s help and strength to come through for them.  Being committed to providing this type of help for my husband has been a process, albeit a very rewarding process.  I have adopted his dreams as my own and vice versa.  
Additionally, assisting him with his dreams and goals has indirectly poured into my goals and dreams.  Never before have I been more on track for fulfilling the call on my life.  I discovered that supporting his dreams didn’t mean that I had to sacrifice my own – if anything, my dreams have been enhanced.
 
 At the end of the day, this process has led to creating something much bigger than ourselves – a family mission that involves the both of us.  For all the newly-weds out there, be encouraged, the changes that are needed to adjust to marriage may seem foreign in the beginning, but they will prove to be rewarding in the end.  The help and encouragement that are needed in marriage may be practical, spiritual or mental, and they have a way of being reciprocal in nature.  For all the wives out there,  how your husband needs your help in a desperate way, you’ll need his help, too! Make your dreams come true together.

Categories
Home Marriage

Marriage & Ministry: 7 Things I've Learned About Being Called to Both

You will often hear people say that your marriage is your number one ministry or that your marriage should be a ministry. So how do you balance both, how do you manage your calling to serve as a leader in the body of Christ and yet be an effective wife or husband, mother or father? I have been doing this for almost 5 years now and these are some of my thoughts.

  1.  You were called before your spouse came -(in most cases) I had a calling before my husband came, marriage has made my calling easier and has enhanced my assignment. Early, we decided that my husband would  focus on building our family financially.  The first 3 years of marriage, while I traveled the nation teaching and preaching,  he would come when he  could,  but our priority was to stabilizing our young family.Both of what we were doing was kingdom work and it was holy unto the lord.  He enhanced my call by allowing me to continue what God had called me to do while he sacrificed. He too was called at that point, but knew we had to work together to make sure both what God had called us to do was manifesting. We both now pastor together, he helps oversee my business and he works full time in a field which is pushing him towards his life dreams.
  2. When your marriage is healthy, your family is healthy and your ministry is healthy-Frustrations in marriage will often show up in ministry, do not be afraid to step down and minister to your spouse and take care of your marriage. Ministry will always be there, but your marriage may not be. When your marriage is healthy, your children will be healthy and what you do as a team will be much easier as you walk in agreement.
  3. All is Holy Unto the Lord- My ministry is not just how well I teach or preach but how will I love my mate, it is how well we love our children, it is how will we manage our finances and care for those who need us. Ministry is not just what happens on the road or on Sunday morning  it is how God is glorified in everything we do. Can people see God through your marriage? Is Jesus Glorified because you and your spouse are together?
  4. You are Your Spouse’s Advocate and Cheerleader– This is your other half,  if ever you begin to follow the lead of others and not your partner it will cause a rift in your marriage. It is your responsibility to fight for your spouse even if they are not in “traditional” ministry. Celebrate them and encourage them to be themselves. Never put other people’s opinions of how you should do ministry or life without considering your spouse.
  5. Our ministries Do Not Have to be the Same-  I have learned that our differences even in our walk with God is what makes us a great couple. Your spouse’s walk does not need to look like yours for you to learn from them. My husband is always teaching me. Always be willing to learn from your spouse.
  6. Discern Seasons- There will be seasons to raise babies which means less ministry time sometimes. There maybe seasons to work on the marriage, their maybe seasons to build the kingdom , their maybe seasons to get your finances together, whatever you do make sure that you always do it together. Let everyone find their part and work together, make no room for the enemy. Realize that seasons are just what they are, seasons. You will not always be there. Push through together and go from there.  Always walk in agreement and it will be well.
  7. Have One Vision-  The number one thing the enemy is after in your life is your agreement. He does not want you to walk in oneness so create a vision for your marriage and assess it early. Make short term goals and long term goals, this helps both of you keep in mind what is important. Make sure the goals and visions cover you guys emotionally, financially and spiritually.

Categories
Communication Marriage

The One Word that Will Keep Pride Out of Your Marriage

couple sitting in the sand and talking on beach
A few weeks ago the Holy Spirit whispered to me “ I want you to be more vulnerable”.
When I heard the word “vulnerable” I immediately thought that I was the poster child when it comes to being vulnerable, especially when it comes to my marriage. I am naturally a “feeler” and enjoy having heart to heart conversations with friends and family. As I began to allow the word from the Lord to rest upon my heart I began to see areas within my marriage in which I have neglected to allow my husband access to, which comes from being misunderstood or rejected.
To be vulnerable is to be : “open to attack or damage, being susceptible to be emotionally wounded, exposure”. What a powerful definition! When I read it for the first time, I was immediately humbled and began to measure the definition to my current life and relationship with my husband.
When you get married you become one with your spouse. Everything that you have is his and everything he has is yours. When you say “I do” I believe that in that moment the Lord knits both of your hearts together along with His to create a powerful team that is unstoppable when they allow themselves to be vulnerable with one another. You may ask how can I be vulnerable with my spouse?
 
Share your deepest dreams and desires with your spouse, allow him into your world.. the good, bad and the ugly. Yes, you see your husband or wife everyday and have conversations about life on a regular basis, but the tone of the conversations are usually surface and ritualistic. I still hear the Holy Spirit whisper to me “share more, he needs to hear your heart”  as I share with my husband an emotional or hard truth that may be taking place in my life. When I obey, I see how our conversation turns from surface to purpose and I begin to see his heart open up and receive me in a whole new way.
Don’t be afraid to be the real you. When you are who God created you to be and you choose to involve him in every area of your life and marriage. You will not be afraid, because you know that whatever you share, that God is involved and that when you and your husband choose to allow Him to be the foundation of all that you say and do, being vulnerable will be a regular and enjoyable practice. Watch how your marriage becomes more enriched as you choose to allow your spouse to visit the most deepest parts of your heart, dreams and desires.

Categories
Marriage Single Spiritual Intimacy

Three Treasures of a Spouse In Love With Jesus

Happy together. Young man kissing beautiful cheerful women while she hugging him and looking at the camera.

I walked into our church’s youth building fifteen years ago. I saw a blonde-haired girl sitting on the floor in a flannel shirt and rolled up jeans, practicing her guitar before the youth service began. She had her eyes closed and an angelic melody was coming out of her, like I had never heard before. When the youth pastor asked her to open the service, she kept her eyes closed and sang to the Lord from her very core. When she spoke, she didn’t speak like the other girls; her tone was different, her demeanor was different, and her focus was different.
I was delightfully baffled and wholly fascinated by this girl who spoke about Jesus as if He were a Friend. Fifteen years later, we are married and have three children. Her unique love and devotion to Christ continues to fascinate me. Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing.” I would venture to say that he who finds a wife who loves Jesus finds a great thing.
Here are three treasures of a spouse who is in love with Jesus:

  1. Joy–As Nehemiah 8:10 says, “The joy of the Lord is your strength.” Joy doesn’t mean an unlimited supply of happiness, but it is a resting place of delight and satisfaction, which result in peace. When a person encounters Jesus, they encounter pure joy. It is a promised additive to Christ’s disciples.

Paul says that the Fruit of the Spirit (the by-product of the Holy Spirit) “is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.” (Galatians 5:22-23) My wife doesn’t walk around with a glued-on, plastic smile, but she is a person who laughs even in darkness and waves the banner of God’s majesty and faithfulness, no matter how dark the storm clouds look. This is joy.

  1. Stability–Those storm clouds I mentioned above have no permanent foothold in a person who is in love with Jesus. The Apostle Paul speaks of a people who are steadfast in their faith: “…We will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming.” (Eph. 4:14)

My wife may have moments of wavering in overwhelming opposition, but she has never been swept away into a lifestyle of deceit or been shipwrecked in her faith. No, my wife is sure-footed as a deer. (Psalm 18:33) Trust me, when those storm clouds choke out the last ray of sunlight, it sure is beautiful to see my wife staring into the storm with a resolute face that says, “I will not be shaken.”

  1. Wisdom—A person who loves Jesus has the mind of Christ. (1 Cor. 2:16) As a couple, we seek the Lord together on everything. We depend on Him. The beauty of a Godly marriage is that two people who have a unique, living, dynamic, friendship with God come together and have a friendship with God together in a way that is equally as unique as the individual relationship with the Lord. The Lord reveals things to Sarah that I haven’t seen yet, and vice versa. True wisdom comes from Him. Many times, the Lord has hidden the answer to a problem in the depths of my wife’s heart, and it is when I ask her what she sees in the situation that I actually can see the heart of God in the situation. I can trust God’s wisdom in her.

I cherish the treasures of Christ that He has deposited in my wife. What are other treasures you see in a person in love with Jesus?

Categories
Home Marriage

The 2 Ways Being an Proverbs 31 Wife Impacts Your Husband

The wife and husband have breakfast together in his kitchen.

Before you got married you had to have prayed to God to help make you a Proverbs 31 woman and you may have even vowed to be a Proverbs 31 Woman to one special man.
 
Some of those main qualities we find in a Proverbs 31 woman include:

  1. Her Faith in God.
  2. Her relationship with her Husband.
  3. Her mothering towards her children.
  4. Her care for her health.
  5. Her ability to serve.
  6. How she takes care of finances.
  7. How she works with her hands.
  8. How she takes care of the home.
  9. How she uses her time wisely.
  10. How she is a woman of beauty and excellence.

It is awesome when a woman is setting herself to be the woman of her man’s dreams which I can tell you now, any man would love a woman who embodies at least half of those qualities mentioned in Proverbs 31.
 
But, what I would like to tackle today is what impact does it have upon a man when his wife is striving to be the Proverbs 31 each day. This is important because it will encourage you to in knowing that your husband needs you to be striving to grow just like you need him to strive to grow.
 

  1. It makes him feel respected.

When I come home from work each day and my wife, who stays at home with our brand new 2 month old, not only has the baby sleep but the house cleaned and in order, I automatically feel a sense of respect and value.
Now, it’s not like this each day, but she has the desire that every time I come home from work for me to come home to peace and order. This causes me to want to work harder for her to make sure she has everything she needs to continue operating in her role during this season of our lives.
Which quality of being a Proverbs 31 woman causes your husband to feel respected? Maybe you work full time too, so it could be helping manage the finances or even managing the schedule for the family. Find out what your husband values, do it, and I guarantee when he feels respected it will cause him to go the extra mile in everything he does. There is nothing greater for a husband than to know he is loved and respected by his family.
 

  1. It will challenge him to be your Ephesians 5 Husband.

Your husband needs to be challenged because you are co-laborers together which means there are times when he is down and you will pick him up and there are times when you are down and he picks you up. No spouse is perfect and always okay. When you are striving to be the Proverbs 31 woman that will challenge your husband to be the Ephesians 5 husband he has the ability to be.
The Ephesians 5 husband is a man who leads his family well and sets an example as the head of the home. But although he may be the head, the wife is the body. They must work together as a team. This is not a challenge to make someone feel less than, but a challenge in order for one to see how great and necessary they really are. This is very attractive to your husband when you tell him how amazingly powerful he is.
I encourage you to look at that list of the qualities of the Proverbs 31 woman and assess which qualities you could strive to be better at in order to help your husband feel respected or to even challenge him in a healthy way to lead your home like he was created to.  Also, be sure to pray each day that God would cause these qualities to become a part of your nature so you do them without even thinking.

Categories
Marriage Physical Intimacy

3 Places On My Wife I Commit to Kiss Everyday and Why

lovers walking in a field at sunset holding hands

The first kiss recorded in the Bible is found in Genesis 27:26-27. When Jacob kissed his son Isaac. This kiss was a sign of respect, honor, and a passing of blessing.
A kiss at its core is a sign of love and respect between two people.
It has now in our culture also become a way to connect non verbally with a person you are romantically involved with, a method of foreplay to prepare one another for sexual intimacy, and a sign of respect to a close one.
In marriage kissing is very vital part of your daily interaction. In my marriage it is already a custom when one person leaves the home we kiss each other, before we lay our heads to sleep we kiss each other, and at a time of celebration we kiss each other.
Each day I have committed to myself and my wife to kiss her in three places that hold a powerful symbol to reiterate 3 core values we vowed to when we got married.

  1. Her Forehead

In the morning before I leave for work, I kiss my wife on her forehead. The reason I kiss her on her forehead is to recommit my vow to honor and protect her thoughts, passions, fears, and her authority as my wife.
The forehead kiss is a sign of honor and respect that communicates you can trust me no matter what. When you kiss a woman at the top of her head you let her know that she can leave her entire life in your care. You let her know that she is safe with you.
2. Her cheek.
A kiss on the cheek is a kiss of friendship. Before you kiss a woman on her lips it is appropriate to kiss a woman on her cheeks during your dating season.
Each day I kiss my wife on her cheek as a commitment to be her best friend through it all. At the foundation of every great marriage is a solid friendship.
Two people who have strive to understand one another through communicating daily, putting the other before themselves through serving, conflict resolution, and respecting each other.
The kiss on the cheek will forever be the kiss that melts a woman’s heart.

  1. Her Lips

Kissing on the lips dates back to Biblical days which we can see in Song of Solomon 1:2, “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—for your love is more delightful than wine.
In the Middle Ages in Europe kissing the on the lips was a sign of equal rank. Which is powerful in marriage because it communicates we are in this together.
At its core in marriage a kiss on the lips is a sign of romantic love.
I commit to kiss my wife daily on her lips to communicate the vow to romantically love her til death do us part, for better or for worse. The kiss on the lips is a commitment to forever be the romancer of her heart.   A kiss on the lips communicates that only you have my affection, desires, and heart.
The commitment to kiss your spouse everyday can build a bridge of trust and communicate your love in another way than just saying it.

Categories
Home Parenting

When Life Hits Rock Bottom: How We Handled Our Miscarriage

Categories
Marriage Physical Intimacy

4 Things Your Husband Really Wants in the Bedroom

 
I want to begin this article off with a bible verse to help lay a foundation…’
1 Corinthians 7:4, “The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.”
Sex within marriage is a GIFT from God! Unfortunately, the enemy has taken this gift and distorted it.
In today’s world ladies there are so many things vying for your husbands attention. In no way did God create you to ever have to compete with a woman on a computer screen, the actresses on TV, or models in magazines.
But, the reality is that the access to pornographic material and the exposure of women’s bodies today is becoming more and more of a problem than ever before.
This is why God said in 1 Corinthians 7:9 that is much better to marry than burn with lust.
I know you may get tired of your husband asking for sex, but PLEASE hear me when I say this…that is a GOOD sign! If you’re husband is asking you for sex, then that means he is running to you to meet his needs rather than something or someone else.
This should make you happy, not upset!
Sex is the greatest opportunity to serve your spouse in a selfless way, and the same for your spouse to do for you.
Men and women may see sex completely different, but that’s the beauty of how God designed us in order for us to WORK AT becoming one in our mind and bodies.
I want to help you by sharing with you the 5 Things Your Husband Really Wants in the Bedroom:
 
1. He Wants You to be Open to Try New Things
Now, I am a firm believer that you should never do anything in the bedroom that one person doesn’t agree with. It doesn’t matter what it is. The marriage bed is a place of unification, not pressure to perform. At that same token, a lot of times its easy for us to stay in a box and not be open to trying new things that could very well spice things up.
One thing me and my wife did that helped us change the norm in our sex life was changed our locations in the house that we had sex. Your husband wants you to be open to try new things, or at least open to discuss it.
 
2. He Wants You to Let Him Pleasure You
There is nothing better for your husband than knowing you are being pleased by him. This is one of the greatest man moments for your husband, so you not only should let him pleasure you, but also tell him when he is doing a good job. Verbal communication is huge for men so they know how they are doing.
For some women that have come from abusive relationships or a hurtful past, it can be challenging to allow yourself be fully loved by your husband. You have to let him in and trust him as your best friend, lover, and confidant. This can take time, but your husband is God’s gift to you to help you through this process.
One of the great scriptures that highlights God’s desire for men to enjoy their wives body is found in Proverbs 5:18, “May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. She is a loving deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts satisfy you always. May you ALWAYS be captivated by her love.”
 
3. He Wants You to Desire Him
Men want to be desired just as much as you want to be loved. This is a huge part of having a healthy sex life before you get to the bedroom. The build up phase to a great time of intimacy is built up by little signs of desire.
Just how you desire the text messages, help around the house, and special date nights alone which all communicate to you that your husband desires you, your husband desires the same. For him its more communicated through flirting through physical touch at random moments, putting on that outfit that makes him look twice when you wear it, or just letting him know how much he rocks your world.
midyearsale!-2
 
 
4. He Wants You to Want It Too
Your husband wants you to want to have sex as well.   I know it is much harder for a woman to experience an orgasm than a man, but this is why it requires teamwork.
Communicate to your husband what you like or desire so you can make your times of intimacy just as pleasing for you as it is for him. Your husband wants you to be their desiring the sex just as much as he does.
 
God’s word is clear that sex is the tool to bring two people closer together than any other force on Earth. This is not done without work, investment, time, patience, and a lot of love!
Be committed to serve your spouse no matter the cost, and I guarantee when you both are embracing that mentality then your times of intimacy will be the most desired times of your day.
We believe strongly that your marriage requires intentional investing in order for it for it to stay healthy and to weather the many storms you and your spouse will face! This is why we created this amazing tool called Sex Without Sheets, which is a 10 Session Set taught by the Nation’s leading Marriage and Relationship Experts to help you and your spouse start having the best sex life now!
Click here to learn more about Sex Without Sheets Sessions! 
finaal2

Categories
Single

10 Qualities of a Man Ready for Marriage

I started thinking about my unmarried or newly married friends and their dating/courting relationships. After you have committed to someone and have dated exclusively for some time, how do you know when you are ready to take the leap of faith and get married?
Marriage is wonderful but it can come with it’s challenges so you need to be prepared emotionally, spiritually, and financially to be happy beyond the wedding day.
This post is focused on the man especially since he is the head of the relationship. I have listed 20 qualities that I believe are attributes of a man ready for marriage. I decided to break this up into two separate articles to keep this one from being a book chapter instead of a blog post. Stay tuned for Part 2 and “Qualities of a Woman ready for a Godly Marriage”.
1. Seeks God with his whole heart-
Psalm 119: 9-11
9 How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word.
10 I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands.
11 I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you.
The scripture says in order to keep yourself pure, hide His word in your heart. Seeking Him with your whole heart will keep you focused on pleasing God in all that you do.
2. Attends, gives and serves at a church
As a saved young woman, I have heard this line many times, “You are a Christian (or saved), oh that’s cool, I go to church, I am a member of…” I am happy that you “go to church”, but I believe you are a true member when you have invested your time, resources and talents to this church. The church cannot run itself without it’s members.
Your local church will be blessed by your help. What areas of the church are you serving in? How can you be a blessing to your pastor and members? I have found that serving in the church keeps you grounded, accountable and you learn so much about yourself and the life of Jesus by serving His people.
3. Has godly friends- Having godly friends will also help with accountability. Having friends who are walking with Jesus that will give you godly advice and will understand your struggles, praises, and will encourage your spiritual growth. The scripture says in Proverbs 27:17 that “Iron sharpens Iron”.
4. Has a good relationship with his family- I know all families are not perfect, but is there communication and respect with and towards the family.
This is important because if there are majors signs of dysfunction in the family, this unfortunately can filter over into your marriage. You will need to have open communication about the future in-laws.
5. Prays with and encourages you to pursue God more while he is pursuing you- The man is the head of the household. He will need to treat the bride as Jesus does the church. The Lord of Lord’s desires a church without spot or blemish.
Jesus loves us with an everlasting love. A godly man will want his wife to be all that God has called her to be. A godly man will want his woman to put God first before him.
6. Has a job or career- The husband will be the provider of the family and head of the household. He will need a job or is working (in school) to obtain a career.
7. Encourages you to  pursue your passion and goals- He will not be intimidated or will not limit his woman’s God given gifts.
8. Abstains from sexual immorality and fornication-
1 Thessalonians 4: 3-5
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God;
1 Corinthians 6:18
Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
The above scriptures describes those that fall to lust as those who do not know God. God does not want you to corrupt your body with this sin. Having sex outside of marriage will bring on a slew of problems into a pure relationship.
It is created for husband and wife only to enjoy. If you are not abstaining from this, you are sinning against God and your body.
This will keep the enemy from corrupting your union before it has even started. If this has already happened in your relationship, please seek Godly counsel on how to proceed with your relationship.
This goes back to being involved in a church, having Godly friends, and being guided by your pastor. Your support system will help you as a couple get back on track.
9. Communicates with you about his past, his struggles, and future- You do not want to have any surprises before you say “I do”.
10. Enjoys spending time with you- My grandfather who had been married for almost 60 years before he passed, gave me and Joel this one piece of marriage advice, “Have fun with each other.”
You want to enjoy your time together even if you are doing something that you don’t want to do. It shows that you want to invest in getting to know your mate and showing them how much you love and appreciate them.