Month: February 2016

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Home Marriage

The 2 Ways Being an Proverbs 31 Wife Impacts Your Husband

The wife and husband have breakfast together in his kitchen.

Before you got married you had to have prayed to God to help make you a Proverbs 31 woman and you may have even vowed to be a Proverbs 31 Woman to one special man.
 
Some of those main qualities we find in a Proverbs 31 woman include:

  1. Her Faith in God.
  2. Her relationship with her Husband.
  3. Her mothering towards her children.
  4. Her care for her health.
  5. Her ability to serve.
  6. How she takes care of finances.
  7. How she works with her hands.
  8. How she takes care of the home.
  9. How she uses her time wisely.
  10. How she is a woman of beauty and excellence.

It is awesome when a woman is setting herself to be the woman of her man’s dreams which I can tell you now, any man would love a woman who embodies at least half of those qualities mentioned in Proverbs 31.
 
But, what I would like to tackle today is what impact does it have upon a man when his wife is striving to be the Proverbs 31 each day. This is important because it will encourage you to in knowing that your husband needs you to be striving to grow just like you need him to strive to grow.
 

  1. It makes him feel respected.

When I come home from work each day and my wife, who stays at home with our brand new 2 month old, not only has the baby sleep but the house cleaned and in order, I automatically feel a sense of respect and value.
Now, it’s not like this each day, but she has the desire that every time I come home from work for me to come home to peace and order. This causes me to want to work harder for her to make sure she has everything she needs to continue operating in her role during this season of our lives.
Which quality of being a Proverbs 31 woman causes your husband to feel respected? Maybe you work full time too, so it could be helping manage the finances or even managing the schedule for the family. Find out what your husband values, do it, and I guarantee when he feels respected it will cause him to go the extra mile in everything he does. There is nothing greater for a husband than to know he is loved and respected by his family.
 

  1. It will challenge him to be your Ephesians 5 Husband.

Your husband needs to be challenged because you are co-laborers together which means there are times when he is down and you will pick him up and there are times when you are down and he picks you up. No spouse is perfect and always okay. When you are striving to be the Proverbs 31 woman that will challenge your husband to be the Ephesians 5 husband he has the ability to be.
The Ephesians 5 husband is a man who leads his family well and sets an example as the head of the home. But although he may be the head, the wife is the body. They must work together as a team. This is not a challenge to make someone feel less than, but a challenge in order for one to see how great and necessary they really are. This is very attractive to your husband when you tell him how amazingly powerful he is.
I encourage you to look at that list of the qualities of the Proverbs 31 woman and assess which qualities you could strive to be better at in order to help your husband feel respected or to even challenge him in a healthy way to lead your home like he was created to.  Also, be sure to pray each day that God would cause these qualities to become a part of your nature so you do them without even thinking.

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Home

4 Powerful Prayers to Rescue You Out of Loneliness, Despair, and Depression

Black woman crying outdoors

The year was 2011, it was my 1st year moving to Chicago after graduating college. I was sitting in my apartment, having a complete pity party. I had left my family, friends, and all I knew back in Louisiana to pursue after God’s will for my life to become a pastor. I also was newly single after just ending a 2 year relationship.
For the first real time I honestly felt alone. I remember immediately looking out my window and saying to God, “I need you right now.”
The feeling of loneliness is a serious deal and it’s the Enemies way to rob you of the rewards and joy of your present season. Loneliness can quickly turn into depression if not dealt with immediately. Here are 4 Scriptures along with prayers that will help RESCUE you out of loneliness, despair, and depression.
Deuteronomy 31:6 declares, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified become of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; He will NEVER leave you nor forsake you. Father we thank you that you have given me the strength to be strong and courageous. I believe you that your Word says for me not to be terrified for you are with me. I declare that I am not lonely for your presence is with me right now.
Psalm 27:10, “Though my father and mother forsake me, the LORD will receive me.” Father I thank you that no matter who comes into or leaves my life that you I will not be moved. I don’t live my life for the praise of man, but I live my life for the praise of God. I thank you that I find my security in you.
Psalm 25:16, “Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.” God, I ask now for an overflow of your powerful presence that has the ability to heal my heart from the roots of depression and loneliness. I declare that I am a child of God who has been bought with a price. I declare that every demon that’s been sent to torment, harass, and oppress me must FLEE in Jesus name. I stand in the authority given to me by Jesus Christ.
Isaiah 43:1-5, “Do not be afraid. I will save you. I have called you by name—you are mine. When you pass through deep waters, I will be with you; your troubles will not overwhelm you. When you pass through fire, you will not be burned; the hard trials that come will not hurt you. For I am the Lord, your God….because you are precious to me and because I love you and give you honor, do not be afraid-I am with you!”.
Father I believe your Word. I believe that you will save me. I believe no matter how bad my situation gets that you will not let it destroy me. I believe that I am precious to you. I believe that you love me and have a purpose for my life that exceeds my wildest imaginations. I believe that my future is bigger than what I feel at this present moment. Amen!

Categories
Dating/Courting Engaged Home Single

5 Clues You've Met a Keeper

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Singles, as I always say love should not be complicated and it should not be too difficult. While most people will not know on the first date if  they’ve met their match, there are definitely some signs you have met a keeper.  Here are some signs that show that someone is into you on the first date.

  1. They are On Time – Whether they are picking you up or you are the one picking them up, most people will make a real effort to be where they need to be. Even if you have agreed to meet somewhere. Because we want to make a good impression most people will do everything they can to be ready or where they need to be.
  2. For Women- The guy opens your doors, pulls out your seat, lets you order first. Basically, he puts your needs before his needs. That Guy is a keeper.
  3. They Want to Know about You– If a person is constantly talking about themselves, they are either nervous or just not that into you. A person that is a keeper will be more interested in learning about you. They will ask questions and listen intently.
  4. They Freely Talk about God- For Christians, the only thing God asks of us in our dating relationships is that we be equally yoked if you meet someone who is passionate about their walk with God, and is interested in your walk with the lord. They are a keeper.
  5. They Talk about the Future– If someone is able to share their vision as to where they hope to be in several years and their plan includes marriage, they may be a keeper, you do not ever want to date someone who does not have marriage in mind. You will be dating for a long time.

Remember to be constantly checking in with the Holy Spirit, he has given you the gift of discernment, discernment is not only to pick up bad things but also good things.

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

Valentine's Day Prayer for Dating Couples

Happy African American Couple Smiling

First off, CONGRATULATIONS! You may be asking why am I congratulating you. Well, you are in a beautiful season in your life.
You are in a dating relationship which means you most likely remember what it was like to be single not to long ago. Be grateful that you are in the season of getting to know someone for the purpose of marriage.
I want to pray over you as you celebrate having someone to treat special this Valentine’s Day.
Father,
I thank you for this dating couple. I pray as they continue to get to know another that they will be wise with every day they are given in this relationship.
May they establish their relationship on the foundation of their love for you.  May this relationship be a testament that it is possible to do relationships God’s way.
I pray you would give them wisdom, strength, and patience as they grow together as a couple. Let their conversations be full of life, and that they will have a community of support to help them during hard times.
Father, I bless this couple with your peace as they press towards being more and more faithful to your Word.
In Jesus Name,
Amen!

Categories
Single

Single's: 3 Encouraging Prayers For You This Valentine's Day

Close-up portrait of beautiful young African American woman with afro hairstyle and green eyes wearing blue sweater. Girl smiling.

I can remember it like it was yesterday – writing in my journal on February 14th asking God to make sure that this was my last year without a valentine. It was then that having someone was more important than anything else. Well, you can rest assured I didn’t have a valentine the next year either.
Was God trying to teach me a lesson? I’m not sure if it was intentional or not, but it worked. I learned that I couldn’t allow what was happening around me to negatively affect what God was doing in my life.
Yes, there are hard to deal with emotions that will arise in you during holidays such as Valentine’s Day. But, learning how to be okay alone is one of the most mature places you can ever get to.
I want to pray over you for 3 specific things as you journey through this Valentine’s Day single.

  1. That you will be content in God’s process over your life,
  2. You will fall more in love with God as your first covenant relationship
  3. You will be grateful that you’re not in a toxic relationship suffering. There’s a powerful quote that says, “ I rather be single than lied to, disrespected, or cheated on.”

Content

Father, I thank you for your precious child as they go through this holiday single, but not alone. I speak the joy of contentment in you over them that they will embrace your process and trust it as the greatest journey to be on.

Satisfied

May they fall more in love with you this Valentine’s day and rediscover the fruit of living a life solely for you. I pray the spirit of gratitude would enter their hearts, soul, and mind that they are not locked up in a toxic relationship taking them no where.

Grateful

And, lastly Father I pray for my brother/sister’s future spouse. May they be found at this very moment preparing themselves for the greatest season of their life. May their hearts be guarded from all distractions of the enemy in order to fully attentive for when your perfect timing comes to bring them together.
Amen.

Categories
Marriage Spiritual Intimacy

Valentine's Day Prayer for Married Couples

Affectionate Senior Couple Kissing In Garden

With Valentine’s Day weekend in full action. We wanted to take time to prayer over you married couples that this Valentine’s Day will be full of reconnecting, refreshing, and reigniting your love for one another.
While many people say everyday should be Valentine’s Day, there isn’t anything wrong with taking time and celebrating your love for another. This is a beautiful time to be extra special with your love that you have built over the years.
I want to pray over you that this Valentine’s Day will be full of God’s spirit and love.
Father, 
I thank you for each man or woman reading this prayer over their marriage. We stand that marriage is created by God,a and should therefore be done for your glory. As each couple makes time this weekend to celebrate their love for one another may they be refreshed in their love for you.  May you grant each couple with the strength to continue to endure the hardships and challenges that marriage brings.
May they have conversations that bring out the memories of why they said, “I Do” in the first place.  May their times of connecting emotionally and physically go beyond what they have ever experienced.
 Father we celebrate you for these marriage, and may your hand of blessing continue to be on them as they grow closer together. And lastly, we declare that nothing will ever come between their love. May it be secured in You. 
In Jesus name, 
Amen! 

Categories
Dating/Courting Engaged Marriage Spiritual Intimacy

5 Crucial Areas to Pray Over Your Future Spouse

My wife is pregnant with our third child. As a mother, carrying this baby from embryo to infant, she is connected with this child. Everything is different. Her body has undergone a transformation as she produces hormones to accommodate the changes taking place on the inside. She felt the first kicks from inside of her womb, the gradual increase in the child’s weight, and effects on her own emotions as a result.
She has felt every single moment of this pregnancy.
It’s different for the father, though. When I found out we were expecting #3, I laughed and cried, and jumped and sang—for a week. Then, I did what most fathers do: I moved on. I went back to work, and life, for the most part, carried on as normal. Not because I wasn’t excited, but because I didn’t have the constant connection with the little one that a mother does.
But that day is approaching when I will see his little face and hear his little cry for the first time, and I will be wrecked. I don’t have to see my unborn child to love him. Soon, I’ll have a new little person in my life, and I’ll wonder how I ever lived without him.
There are things I can do now to love this person. It will be the same with your future spouse.
You may not have the visual evidence of your future spouse, but you have hope of seeing that distant desire explode into radical reality. Right now, he or she is in the thick of life. Don’t underestimate the impact of prayer.
Here are five crucial areas to be praying over your future spouse:

  1. Faith— You may not know the level of faith of your future spouse. As Christians, we know that the Lord does not want us to be unequally yoked with someone who does not share your love for Christ. (2 Corinthians 6:14) Pray for their encounter with God. Pray that their hearts will be set firmly and passionately for Christ. Pray that he or she will have the spiritual eyes to see that great, sweet, affection of the Father for His children.
  2. Family – You can learn so much about a person by their family. Pray that any familial wounds will be healed. Pray for the provision, health, safety, and discipleship of your future spouse’s family, and for the relationship between parents and children.
  3. Friends – Pray for the friends of your future spouse. Pray that he or she will be surrounded by godly friends who sharpen as iron sharpens iron (Proverbs 27:17). Pray that these friends will provide the accountability and standard of godly relationships that your future spouse needs.
  4. Finances – Pray for the way your future spouse handles money! Pray that he or she will be enlightened to see the snare of debt—and run! Pray that your future spouse rightly makes his or her money work for the Kingdom of Heaven, rather than being enslaved by the love of it.
  5. Future—Pray for your future spouse’s future. After all, you’re in it! Pray that God releases every promise He has made to your future spouse. Stand on the promises of God for this man or woman and declare that the enemy is powerless over your future spouse. Pray that God will order your future spouse’s footsteps. Pray that he or she will not grow weary in well-doing (Gal. 6:9), and for the day your paths merge.

One day, the mystery will be unveiled, and you will see the beauty that God has wrapped up as a precious gift to present to you!
 
M&Y is hosting an Online Singles Conference next month! If you are interested in registering or learning more about it, you can check out our website here: The Online Singles Conference

Categories
Dating/Courting Engaged Home Single

Let HER Work

I was visiting a bible study a few weeks ago with about 30 young adults. This bible study was full of people from every walk of life. That night, toward the end of the bible study, the leader decided to go around the room and have each person share where they were in their journey with patience. As I listened to everybody respond, there seemed to be a common theme in the room. That theme was patience in relationships and the desire to be married.
 
After listening for a while, the Holy Spirit spoke to me about the purpose of patience in every area but especially pertaining to relationships. One of the things I realized that night was that most people look at patience as a plague or even a punishment from God. Some said it was extremely difficult to be patient especially in relationships because often times they knew what they wanted and wanted it right away.
 
There seemed to be a lack of a desire and a value for patience that night and more value for the prize that exists on the other side of patience. So many people shared how they felt that if they could just be patient, it would be worth it in the end because they would get the guy or the girl that they desired. As I thought about it more, how does being patient help you obtain a prize? It doesn’t. In fact it can be quite opposite. Being patient sometimes can cause you to miss out on what you thought was going to be the prize.
 
In all of this, there are three things that I think are important to know about being patient in relationships. This could mean waiting for the one and not rushing into a relationship. It could also mean being patient with yourself and where you thought you would be right now in relationships. It could also mean being in a relationship and not rushing to the altar for the sake of the prize. No matter where you find yourself, here is what is important to know about patience:
 

  1. You must learn to value patience.

I wish I understood this concept when I was rushing to the altar of marriage, fresh out of college. I had no value for patience, therefore, like many of the people in the room that night, it was so much harder to be patient and so much more tempting to jump the gun in relationships, even to the point of the marriage. I had no ability to measure the damage that would be caused due to my lack of patience.

  1. Patience is not about the prize you will receive, it’s about the process you are in.

Oftentimes we think of patience as a caveat: “if we just hold out, then we will get the woman of our dreams or the man of our dreams.” The reality is, you being patient has nothing to do with the person you will end up with. It has everything to do with your trust in God and where He is taking you in life. When people are impatient, especially in relationships, it is like they are telling God to hurry up because He doesn’t understand what they need or want.

  1. Patience PERFECTS you!

The main reason patience is so important is because the Bible makes it clear in James 1, verse 4, “But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing.” When patience is exercised and grown in your life it perfects you. I think about people who jump the gun in relationships only to find out they still had unresolved issues on the other end of the rush – even in areas of purpose and careers. Usually when people move too quickly, they jump into something without the necessary tools to sustain their position.
 
Such was my case which led me to a divorce in less than a year. Rushing to the altar for marriage so that I would not “fall into sin” only caused me to abort the process of perfection that could only come from patience. I simply sold somebody a fragmented version of myself because I never allowed patience to have its perfect work. I was incomplete but made others believe that I had it together because I moved ahead of the process I was in.
 
Having patience in your relationships will allow God to complete the process IN YOU. It will help the other person to ensure that the person they are with (hopefully forever) will be complete, lacking nothing because of patience. Any time you jump ahead of your process, you rush into something and end up looking good on the outside while being hollow on the inside. As you enjoy the life you live, I encourage you to slow down. Don’t rush. Let patience perfect you so that when you do move into a relationship you will be complete, lacking nothing because you allowed patience to work.
 
M&Y is hosting an Online Singles Conference next month! If you are interested in registering or learning more about it, you can check out our website here: The Online Singles Conference

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

Burden or Benefit: Is it Worth my Time?

Beauty with laptop. Attractive young African woman in warm sweater working on laptop while sitting on the window sill

This is the beginning of the New Year and it is usual for people to start up their dream boards and yearly goals. While brainstorming on the direction that I wanted my life to take this year, I began to get overwhelmed with the amount of things that I had already committed myself to. I stopped and asked myself one of the most important questions that I have ever evaluated… “Am I wasting my time? And if not, is all that I am involved in a burden or benefit?”
Life has a way of demanding so much of our time, and if we are not careful we easily find ourselves struggling to keep up with an overwhelming load. Whether it was pressure or voluntarily, we love the idea of being busy, but struggle with the reality of expounding the effort. Some may delegate the blame to some false reality that they “HAD” to do it, when the truth is that we all have CHOICE. I was always taught that most often, “People are exactly where they want to be.”
Time is one of the most precious assets that every human being has. It is the one and only things that can’t be compounded, saved, reinvested, or given more of. The simplest example of this is the local hair dresser who charges $15 for a haircut and another that charge $25. The difference of the two is the one that values their time, and perhaps have even spent more time sharpening their craft. Both in this example most likely have a different perspective on how much they think their time is worth, and how well they will manage the time they have. Once we begin to put more value on our time, we LITERALLY begin to reevaluate the things that we give our time away to!
Looking at your life at this very moment, ask yourself, “Has my time been invested in things that burden or benefit my life?” Think of your job, business, ministry, nonprofits, etc and be honest with yourself about the time that you’re spending in any of them and evaluate what it is doing to cultivate your life. James 4:14 reads, “Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.” Embracing this scripture, we see that time is the MOST valuable thing that we have. You can’t get it back or save it up…So make it worthwhile!!!

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

Singles: Have You Prayed This Prayer Before?

African American businessman is thinking intensely

Quick question….
Have you ever prayed this prayer before?
God, can you send my future spouse? 
In no way am I judging you for praying this prayer because you better believe I prayed this SAME EXACT prayer when I was single. It was then that God told me to stop asking Him for my spouse, and He told me to pray another prayer…..
Lord, PREPARE ME for my future spouse. 

This prayer CHANGED the game for me in every way possible because it took me on a serious journey of LEARNING ME.
And, I can tell you now I wasn’t ready to be honest with how unprepared I really was for marriage.
I stopped playing games with my single season, got rid of all the BAGGAGE (soul ties), and started to focus on me.
I met Natasha (my beautiful and amazing wife) soon after, and our marriage is AMAZING because of the season I spent intentionally preparing myself for marriage.
It is for this reason we created The Online Single’s Conference.
To help singles stop agonizing over their single season and transform into a season of preparation for their future marriage.
Not only will you have us (The Miller’s) to learn from but also, Cornelius & Heather Lindsey, Lamar and Ronnie Tyler, Drs. Matthew & Kamilah Stevenson and 15 other World Class speakers.
Click Here to Register Now!
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The Early Bird rate CLOSES Sunday at midnight and you will MISS OUT on over $150 in bonuses if you fail to register by the deadline. 
Don’t procrastinate with this one.
Invest into your future marriage now.
Click here to register before its to late.