Tag: relationship-killer

Categories
Engaged Home Marriage

5 Things to Do While Engaged

I love you. Amazed surprised positive African American couple sitting in the cafe and being covered with a blanket while getting engaged

The average wedding in the United States cost $26,720.
Whether single or engaged we all have thought about what our big day will look like.
Love is beautiful, especially when you fall in love with the right mate that God has created for you. But the reality of marriage, is that it takes work to stay married.
My husband and I, married on March 11, 2017. We were excited about our BIG DAY. But we wanted our marriage to be more beautiful than our wedding day. To be honest, our wedding day flew by so fast. I woke up the next morning wanting a redo. Then, I thought for a minute – maybe not. It was a lot of work.
I said all that to say, don’t allow that day to become your main focal point that you miss the reason that God has joined you together. Don’t rush through the engagement season. There are some things that God needs to impart into your life, so that you make it to the altar. God just doesn’t want us to make it the altar and then we fail at staying married. Marriage is not just about surviving, but God wants us to thrive.
Life is going to become hectic with the wedding planning, but I want to encourage you to stay focused on the promises of God. I also, want you to enjoy your engagement season!
Here are 5 Things to Do While Engaged:

  1. Pre-martial Counseling. Don’t miss this step. PLEASE! This is necessary to help you improve your relationship before you get married. Topics will be discussed that you probably hadn’t put too much thought into before.
  2. Connection with other Married Couples. You need this. Spend time with other seasoned couples and allow them to share their truth about marriage. Hopefully, you partner with a couple that will be transparent about the good times and even the bad times that marriage can bring.
  3. Praying Together = Staying Together. Pray like never before. The enemy is going to attack you in this season. He doesn’t want to see you make it to the altar. Pray that God protect you from dangers seen and unseen and that he continue to keep a hedge of protection around your relationship. In Jesus name, Amen!
  4. Don’t Forget to Worship. Public worship is the best. Coming together on one accord to worship God is an awesome feeling. It brings you and your significant other closer together. Their love for God is what probably brought you two together in the first place.
  5. Spend Quality Time Together. Stay connected even though you may be excited about the BIG DAY ahead. Continue to court each other. Make sure you have Date Night in the midst of all the planning.

There was a reason that I shared the cost of the wedding at the beginning of this blog post. I don’t want to see you value you your wedding day, more than you value your marriage. Marriage can and will be beautiful when you put in the work to stay married.
 

Categories
Engaged Marriage

2 Conversations You Should Have With Family & Friends Before You Get Married

Japanese and black friends drinking coffee in kitchen

Genesis 2:24, which states that “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.” was often a topic of discussion in my premarital course. Our mentor couple did a wonderful job of explaining to us that in this context leaving your father and mother, also represents leaving your friends or other love ones that might tempt you to put their needs before your spouse’s. After him, God intended for your spouse to be your number one priority. Having these two conversations with your family and friends will help you with honoring your spouse’s rank:
1. Parents
You will want to be honest with your parents about what role you want them to play in your new family unit. The discussions with parents should center around your expectations of them in supporting your new marriage journey and their expectations of your role in their family. Ask your parents to be supportive of your marriage, pray for you and your spouse, and for them to be available when counsel or advice is needed. It may also be necessary to remind your parents that God calls us to cleave to our spouse. It is important that your actions start to reflect the behavior of leaving and cleaving. When your parents see you tending to your partner before you tend to them, they will witness your commitment to your spouse. As a final touch to this conversation, your parents will appreciate you asking what expectations they have of you and your spouse in joining their larger family unit. This question might invite conversations about family holidays and frequency of visits. 
 2. Friends
Relationships with friends naturally alter once you get married. Similarly with your parents, obligations with your spouse may prevent you from devoting as much time to your friends. One part of this conversation should explain that your spouse and starting your own family unit is now your main priority. Be sure to communicate that this new commitment will require more of your time and focus. Make it clear that their friendship is still important to you and you will continue to work to maintain it. The second part of this conversation should include you inviting your friend to become an accountability buddy. Ask your friend to check in on you to make sure you are being a Christian spouse and to assist you with refraining from behaviors that could compromise your character. This will give your friend a new opportunity to be involved in your life and you will benefit from having someone to hold you accountable for your actions.
 
Author note:
Brooke Fitzpatrick is devoted to empowering young couples about the beauty of marriage. She is happily married to her husband, Jared and the experiences of her marriage adventure have provided her with a wealth of knowledge to share with others as they embark on their marriage journey. You can vconnect with her via theauthenticbride@gmail.com. 

Categories
Home Single

3 Ways to Know if You're Ready for a Relationship

thoughtful woman sitting alone outdoors

Do you think you are ready to enter a committed relationship ? Read below, to see if you truly are !

 

 1. Do you Love the Lord with all Your Heart ?

Is the Lord your everything ? A good indicator that God is your everything is seeing where you spend your time. How much time do you devote yourself to the Word and prayer ? Are you filling your mind with that which will put your affections on things above ? Is making Jesus’ name known a top priority? Are you serving in your local body ? Remember, loving the Lord is the biggest commandment God has given us.

To be in a relationship and ultimately marriage that is successful, one must be rooted in the foundation of God. When God brings two people together, it’s for the furtherance of God’s kingdom. Your season of singleness must be focused on learning your role as a child of God.

When you enter a relationship you are not looking for someone to complete you. That’s God’s job. This foundation will help you when your relationship will go through tough times (which it will). When your partner doesn’t give you the attention you need you can rest knowing that God has your back !

 2. Are you the Petty Master ?

If you are entering a relationship you must ensure that all feelings of animosity from the past are resolved. Ex – relationships that have left you with lingering feelings of anger, wrath and spite must be resolved. If you had a bad childhood, you’d be surprised how such trauma can be projected on future relationships. Ask God to examine your thoughts and heart and allow Him to bring healing to any unresolved issues. Constantly take authority over thoughts that bring animosity. Forgive those who have wronged you. The Bible takes it one step further and even says to pray for those who persecute you.  Remember, you want your new relationship to start on a clean slate. In the present, you must be one who doesn’t get easily angered over small things.

 3. Are you Creating a Better Future for Yourself ?

Are you someone with ambition ? Are you working to create a future for not just yourself, but those around you ? You can take courses to learn practical household keeping skills such as cooking. Are you working, in school, focused on your business ? Do you practice good discipline and working towards building good credit, budgeting and more ? Are you actively finding ways to get out of debt ? These are some of the many questions to ask yourself. Don’t stress if you have not mastered good stewardship principles. You can always start practicing now ! This is important because your significant other would want you to bring something to the table as well.

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

3 Things to Consider to Attract the Right Man

Young beautiful african american girl with an afro hairstyle. Laughing girl wearing eyeglasses. Portrait. Yellow background. Girl looking at camera.

Have you heard the old saying, “birds of a feather flock together?” The same holds true when dating. If you are desiring a godly man, how you present yourself determines who you attract as a potential mate. Although the world has their own tactics and standards, there are godly non-negotiable principles to attract a godly man. Here are 3 things to consider to attract the right man God’s way:

  1. Your Love Pursuit of God. As a godly woman, your relationship with God will attract the right man. When you pursue God with all your heart, soul, and mind, a godly man will see confidence, value, and worth that is rooted in your relationship with Christ (Matthew 22:37). Your inward and outward glow for God will radiate and let him know that you do not easily settle for just anything (Proverbs 31:10).
  2. Presentation is Everything. The world applauds physical attraction as a sure-fire way to lure the right mate. Focusing on looks, curves, and worldly ambitions are not the way to build a relationship on a solid foundation. Remember that first impressions do count! When loving and honoring yourself is the presentation, your modest style of dress, friendliness, smile, character, and personality will be your reputation to attract the right man seeking to date you (Proverbs 31:30).
  3. Take the Mask Off. You’ve heard the saying – real recognizes real. A godly man knows what he wants to pursue and will recognize if you are real or not as he gets to know you. The message that you send to a potential partner should be one that is honest and authentic (Ephesians 4:22-24). A godly man will look for these things to see how the relationship will blossom:
  • Does she respect others well?
  • Is her life built on service and love or is it just displayed in church settings (Hebrews 13:16)?
  • What do her family relationships and friendships look like?
  • How does she treat her parents and other people that are significant in her life (Romans 12:8)?

When it comes to a love relationship with the right man, keeping God first and applying these principles will help you attract a godly relationship. Are there any other principles you would add that have worked for you?
 
 
 
 

Categories
Dating/Courting Home Single

5 QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF AFTER A BAD BREAK-UP

Lonely young man looking at camera

First, I want you to know that you are not alone. Many people have suffered from bad break-ups – sometimes several bad break-ups; some have endured more than they would like to admit. After going through such pain, you have to ask yourself: Why? Why are you going through continuously toxic relationships and entering into them with wrong people? What are you learning from each of these experiences? The most important part of these situations is that you are gaining knowledge of yourself and that you are healing from each person that has hurt you before you pursue another relationship.
Healing takes time and going into something or involving yourself with someone new while broken or fragmented will only yield the same results. What are you doing to change your situation? What is God teaching you? I am a firm believer that God teaches us something from every situation we encounter and that there is a lesson in each experience.
Ask yourself:

  • Is the situation good or bad?
  • Is it a result of me following God’s will or my own will?
  • Or is it just a circumstance of life?

Why? The reason is that God is a teacher and He loves to teach us through experiences that will help us become better people; that will help us grow into His vision of us.
After a bad break-up, it is very important to reflect on what caused the relationship to be unhealthy. In most cases, relationships that end badly also started the same way. Evaluating your association will help you have a better understanding of why you participated in the relationship, in which areas you need to improve yourself, and what mistakes to avoid repeating in the future.
If you are like me, you don’t want to continuously experience the same awful cycles that often are the root cause of toxic relationships. Participating in back to back relationships and seeing the same results each time shows you that you are in a cycle!
In order to break free from the train ride of doom and set new standards for yourself, you need to ask yourself these 5 questions:
 1. What red flags did I decide to look past?
You should never go into any relationship with your feelings or emotions leading the way. By letting yourself be led by emotions, you become a target for deception. Being controlled by your feelings is equivalent to walking into a relationship blind. There are always red flags as to why someone isn’t good for you, and if you are not sober enough to recognize those flags, you will end up in a relationship that is based off your need for comfort and company.
 2. What part of me is broken that caused me to entertain wrongful company?
I’m going to piggyback off of the previous point. More often than not, people who are broken are willing to forsake the truth for comfort and company; they want to combat their loneliness. This reality can stem from a number of factors such as: lack of identity, insecurity, and unhealed wounds from past relationships. It is important to discover which areas of your soul still craves disastrous attention in order to uncover why you choose the mates that you do.
 3. Am I insecure?
The role of insecurity is to make you think you deserve less than what God wants for you; what He wills you to be. Insecurities block you from knowing and recognizing your worth. A person that is insecure will pursue and accept the wrong relationships. A secure person, in contrast, will understand that they are worth the wait, the pursuit, and will always uphold standards that they have set for themselves.
 4. Am I aware of my purpose?
If you are not aware of your purpose and your calling, you will more than likely date whoever seems most attractive. Those who understand their purpose will only entertain relationships that will comply with their calling on this earth. For example, if you desire to travel to many destinations over the course of your life, it wouldn’t be wise to begin a relationship with someone that does not like to fly in airplanes. Continuing to date someone that doesn’t match your future goals and God’s will is simply a waste of your time and theirs.
 5. Who am I?
This is a question that most people are not able to answer truthfully. I cannot stress enough the importance of knowing who you are before pursuing a relationship. Not knowing your identity will only hinder your association and cause more harm than good. If you are struggling to answer this question with detail and substance, you should honestly wait to pursue anyone other than God. The pursuit of God will uncover the answer to the most crucial question there is: Who Am I?
Now I admonish you to see the bright side of your break-up and make it work in your favor. Stop putting yourself through an endless cycle! It’s time to get off the roller coaster and focus on you. Answer the 5 questions listed and do the work needed to become your best self before deciding to share your heart with another again.

Categories
Communication Dating/Courting Single

I Think He’s The One…Or Is He?

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Have you found yourself going over a long list of qualities that you desire in a man?  Or have you met the one that you think is right for you, only to wonder if he is really the one God has sent?  Although you may have desires for your mate that are absolutes, the man that is perfect for you is the one that God has selected for you.
If you are in a place where you are in a new relationship or desiring one, here are 3 tips to consider to know if he is the one or not:

  1. Does he have passion for God? One way to know he is the one is seeing a true passion for God, where God is first in his life. If God is first, then he will respect your passion for God, morals, and values in the relationship.  The right one will not cause you to stray away from godliness (2 Corinthians 6:14). What does his prayer life, worship, and devotional life look like?  Take time to discern and make sure that the pursuit of God is the most important thing to ensure you are on the right path (Proverbs 3:5-6).
  2. Can you trust him? Trust is a huge part of being in a relationship. Communicating, making sure your actions match your words, and being integral are sure ways to measure trust and encourage the building of mutual love and respect (John 10:37). Here are some questions to consider regarding trust:
  • Does he protect you, cherish you, and support you?
  • Does he lead you with godly wisdom?
  • Are you comfortable sharing your goals and dreams with him?
  • Does he celebrate you as you fulfill your God-given destiny?
  1. Does he embrace your authenticity? A lot of times, women feel as if their past disqualifies them from a promising relationship with the one God presents. This is further from the truth.  The one that God sends will sharpen the authentic you through affirmation and support (Proverbs 27:17).  This means he is not ashamed of your testimony. In fact, he encourages the God in you to shine! You will know he is the one when he stays committed through all challenges and falls in love with you even more from it all (Romans 8:28).

Whether you are in a new relationship or desiring one, remember to pray and ask God if he is the one. Be open and follow whatever God speaks or shows you.  Are there any tips that you can add?  Please share!

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

I Called My Wedding Off: 4 Questions to Ask Yourself to Determine If He's the One-Part 1

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I called my wedding off. It was two months prior to my big day. The date had been set, bridesmaids chosen, venue booked, and wedding dress ordered but… I just couldn’t do it. I’d dated this man for years. It made sense that the next step would be marriage but I had doubts. I knew something was missing but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. After a brief (11 months), courtship with my now husband, I couldn’t help but consider what was so different this time around. How is it that I could date one man for years, have doubts? Date another man for 11 months and have zero doubts?
Perhaps you’re like me. You’ve been dating a man for years but deep down in your soul you know, this can’t be it. You know he’s not the one but you’re comfortable. Change is scary. You have so much history. “Why rock the boat?” You’re slowly warming up to the idea of settling. You begin to reason with yourself. “It’ll get better after marriage.”
I knew what “wrong” felt like. It was marked by uneasiness. In my gut, I knew something was missing. At the time, I didn’t know what “right” felt like. After meeting my amazing husband, the pieces of the puzzles became extremely clear. I can confidently say, you know when it’s wrong, and you know when it’s right. If you haven’t reached a place of certainty, perhaps you need to pump the brakes. You may discover, just as I did, God’s perfect mate for you.
So, is he the one? I can’t answer that. Only you and God can. However, what I can offer, are thought provoking questions to consider. After answering these questions, it may become evident, or it may not. Either way, go to the Father. Just like any loving Father, He adores you. He loves it when you run to Him for help.
 1. Does he know God or “know of “Him?
John 2:3, “And we can be sure that we know him if we obey his commandments.” To know God is to obey Him. There are many temptations in life. If a man truly knows God, he’ll be more inclined to do right by you. He won’t leave you guessing. He won’t play games with your heart. You’ll never be able to watch a man 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Your presence is limited; however, God is omnipresent. He’s everywhere at the same time. Knowing your potential mate is being held accountable to God brings a level of comfort. I’m not saying this man will be perfect, because he won’t. You and I aren’t either. I’m simply saying, obedience to God doesn’t lead to sin.
 
 
 2. Does he pray with you?
James 5:16, “…The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” I was 33 years old and had been engaged twice before I ever had a man (outside of deacons or pastors) pray aloud with me. I was in relationships where I was told prayer was taking place but I never saw it. I won’t say they didn’t do it. I can only attest to what I saw.
I was on the phone with Chris, who wasn’t my husband at the time, for the very first time. Prior to hanging up the phone, he asked, “Can I pray with you?” “Wayment! What?! I was taken aback. Like alllllllll the way back! When he prayed, although my eyes were closed, I observed the ease of the words flowing from his mouth. Prayer wasn’t something he learned before he called me that night. He was comfortable. His tone was relaxed. He’d been there, at God’s feet, before. It was comforting to know he had a prayer life. That he knew the importance of prayer. That I could count on him to pray for me. That he knew how to communicate with God.
I truly hope you’ve enjoyed reading thus far. Stay tuned for Part II where the last two questions will be revealed. In the meantime, we’d love to hear from you. Do you think the first two questions are important in determining if he’s the one?
 

 
Tiffany Phillips is a southern girl, residing in Sweet Home Alabama. She’s a Christian, wife (married to the most amazing man, Chris), health and fitness enthusiast, and blogger who is eager to share what God has placed on her heart. Visit Tiffany over at her blog teawithtiffanyp.com
Why Tea With Tiffany P? Because she’s spilling all the tea! 

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

Holy Suicide-Are You Really Ready For Marriage?

Rear view of a vintage car with just married sign and cans attached

Marriage-it’s a beautiful thing, but often it becomes an overemphasized reality to many particularly when it comes to exploring the purpose in which it is intended. We hear mini-series, webinars, and bullet-point presentations on the best ways to attract, prepare, and even pray concerning our future spouses; however, once the preparation has ended, I beg to ask the question, are you really ready to die?
 
Die? Woah! Things just took an extreme turn, but stay with me.
Yes, marriage is the sacred joining together of two individuals in which love, commitment, faithfulness, loyalty, submission, and fidelity are interwoven around the Lordship of Christ. All of these things fuel the union that is both symbolic of Christ’s relationship with the church and His unrelenting devotion to keep this relationship upheld. But how relentless was Christ in showing his love? How do we know what love is?
 
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. – 1 John 3:16
 
Jesus laid down his life on our behalf. He offered Himself up through the act of “laying down,” i.e. dying on our behalf. One death and one resurrection laid the foundation for us to live a life of constant adoration and reverence to the Father.  This death showed us what love is. This death showed us the intense passion and pursuit that drove the Father in His pursuit of having lifetime union with us. This death, the decision to give our livelihood for another, is the template by which marriage is built.
 
When you stand at the altar and repeat “I Do,” you are not just simply agreeing to the terms of eternal bliss, constant devotion, and unconditional regard as a means to the end. The means to the end is dying enough to yourself, so that your partner gets to live. Christ didn’t just die to stay dead, but He ended up living as a result of the decision and gave us the opportunity to live, too. So, it is the same for marriage.
 
When you decide to die to your selfish ways, your partner gets to live in kindness. When your spouse decides to die to pessimism, you reap the benefits of confidence and hopefulness. When you decide to die to your prideful ambitions, your partner gets to abide in humble outcomes. When your partner decides to die to unforgiveness and harboring resentment, you get the thrill of being tossed in the throes of mercy and immunity from your own short-comings and character insufficiencies.
 
All in all, when you both make the decision to die to the parts of you that don’t resemble the nature of Christ,  you get to encounter the process of transformation that ultimately draws you both closer to that very nature itself. Dying to self to look like Christ. Dying to self for your spouse to be like Christ. Dying to selves to glorify Christ. All of these are the genesis of what marriage was constructed to be.  
 
You see, the beauty of marriage is the intention behind it—the sanctification that draws us to look more like Christ. It’s so much bigger than being with someone that looks good, brings you joy, loves you completely, and draws you closer to Christ. While these things are evident, they are not the conclusion of the matter.  Marriage in and of itself is being joined with the one used in the hands of Christ to cause the parts of you that don’t resemble him—to die. What makes it beautiful is that you get to do the same with your spouse and the love of Christ that makes this all possible is put on display to ultimately bring glory to Him.
 
I know that you thought marriage was going to be a conglomerate of happiness, bliss, joy, hard times, disagreements, and endurance. But let’s add the part that few like to discuss—the never-ending process of sanctification. Again, the joy of marriage is found in the intention for which it was built.  So, whether you’re married and things seem too difficult or you’re single and the thought of marriage has become too sought after, ask yourself, “Is (or am I ready for) this holy suicide making me look like Him?”  If the answer is yes—you’re not only equipped, but you’re well ready.
 
Take Heed and Live Free,
Chelle
 

Richelle is a Christian, Speaker, Author, Counselor and lives in Orlando, Florida. She has a heart for all things Jesus and loving on people! She believes that where there is brokenness, there is beauty and where there is heartbreak, there is hope! She is passionate in pursuing individuals who feel distraught, lost, and hopeless and desire that they, along with others who have not experienced the fullness of the Father’s love, will find themselves completely restored in it! 

She is the Founder and Executive Editor of Show Those Scars, an organization that promotes transparency and honesty to bring healing and wholeness in Christ.  Her passions include counseling, writing, hanging out with friends & family, and cooking! More of her works can be found on her website,  www.showthosescars.com  

Categories
Dating/Courting Single

9 Ways to Know He Is the One

Head And Shoulders Portrait Of Couple On Holiday

Think you may have found a catch, or not sure what to look for you validate what you may feel like is “the one?” Here are some guidelines and qualities to keep an eye out for:
 1. He is committed to Christ. His relationship with God comes first and you can see that in his actions. I put this quality first as it should be evident in everything listed below. His priorities, how he serves, the fruit of his actions are clear that they come from spending time in the secret place with God.
 
2. He is committed to loving you. We all have our faults, and relationships are a good place to see them out. If you take two imperfect individuals and merge their lives together, I can guarantee your shortcomings will manifest. The key is handling them both for yourself and how he responds to you in these times. Does he have a willingness to work through your faults with you? Is he willing to apologize when he is wrong? Does he encourage/support you? Does he have a willingness to learn/adapt to make your relationship work together? Learning to love one another is a process, but it can be done with a healthy dose of effort, grace, patience, and understanding.
 
3. He respects you. He doesn’t treat you as inferior and honors you for the woman that you are. He admires you, treats you with value and takes what you have to say seriously. He doesn’t try to control you.
 
4. He knows how to “adult.” He can hold down a job, he is independent, he can clean up after himself, and he stewards his finances well. It’s important to have a man who can handle responsibility and is someone you can depend on. You’re not looking to adopt an adult child, you are looking for a life partner, a teammate to go through life TOGETHER.
 
5. He talks about the future (and includes you in it). If there is one thing I know about a man, when they want something, they go after it. Having a healthy dose of ambition, having goals, and being future-minded will keep you from running in circles and wondering where you stand in his life. Ambition and goals allow you to see their desire for growth and success.
6. He is kind. You can tell a lot about a person by how they talk about and treat people around them. How does he treat his mom? His parents? How about his friends? Pay attention to other relationships or other interactions (even with strangers) that will give you more insight into their true character (when they aren’t focused on trying to impress you).
7. He is honest and integral. This goes hand in hand with many others: being trustworthy, loyal, and having an appropriate level of transparency with you. Marriage isn’t the time to find out about children from other relationships, or any other past secrets. If you are considering spending your life with someone, it is important there is an established open line of communication.
8. He is intentional. If he doesn’t pursue you now, a ring is not going to change his behavior. Know you are a woman of value, and don’t settle to be treated less than. You are more than just an option- to someone, you are their future. We accept the love we think we deserve.
9. He challenges you. He strives to help make you a better person – instilling confidence where you feel like you lack, instilling love when you feel rejected, reinforcing belief that you can when you feel you can’t. He tries to help you succeed and become all God has in store for you.
 
Is it realistic to expect or find a man with all 9 qualities? Maybe, maybe not. He may be really strong in some, and growing in other areas. Be wise, seek counsel. Use these qualities as a guideline and don’t be afraid to ask mentors or close friends to weigh in their opinions on a relationship as well.

Categories
Dating/Courting Home Single

8 Consequences of Dating the Wrong Guy

There are tons of consequences that stem from dating the wrong guy. Some of us only know bad relationships so it becomes a perpetual cycle. But it’s time to break that cycle. Your heart, your destiny and purpose and your future deserves better than relationships with the wrong guys. Here are 8 consequences of dating the wrong guy:

  1. Wasted Time. Time is something that we can never get back so we have to be wise with how we use it. Staying in a relationship with a guy that you know you have no future with is a waste. If there is no future then cut your ties and move on.
  2. Delayed Promise. When you were born, God had a specific assignment for you to complete but if you’re entangled in the wrong relationship then it is possible to delay the promise on your life. Promise works best when you’re connected to right relationships.
  3. The Right Guy. When you’re trotting around with the wrong guy, the right guy can’t find you. Or if he does find you, he’ll think you’ve already been found. Now you’re delaying the chance of feeling true love.
  4. Broken Spirit. Being with the wrong person can leave you feeling hopeless. You’ll feel like you’ll never be found by the right person. Having a broken spirit often leaves you feeling blah about life and your future.
  5. Trust Issues. Dating the wrong guy will have you doubting the right guy. Meaning, even if the right guy comes around, if you haven’t dealt with the consequences of dating the wrong guy, you’ll try to make him pay for another man’s mistakes. And that’s not fair.
  6. Soul Ties. You formed these ungodly emotional connections that last long after the relationship is over. I call it residue. Soul ties are like residue. You may not be in that relationship anymore but your heart still is and until you sever that tie, you’ll won’t be able to have a healthy connection to the right guy.
  7. Broken-Heart. Because you’ve allowed yourself to form a bond with this person and you now have an emotional connection, when the relationship ends you will be left with a broken heart. This broken heart could have been avoided if you would’ve heeded to the signs when they were first shown to you. It’s enough stuff out here to break our hearts, let’s not put ourselves intentionally in a situation of heartbreak.
  8. It turns you into a serial dater. You’ve dated the wrong guy, now you’re so fixated on finding someone “better” that you’re in and out of relationships. Sometimes the best thing for you to do is to sit still. Heal your heart and allow God to be in charge of your love life.