Tag: inspirational

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Single Spiritual Intimacy

Defeated: My Family’s Demons Are Stronger than Me

Written by:  Briana Whiteside
 
I didn’t stand a chance.
 
It is quite intriguing that the words family and familiar are spelled almost exactly alike. The Latin spelling of the word family, familia, means to be a servant of a household, while familiar means to be close and intimate; however, further research into familiar leads back to family. I think it is telling that these words are almost synonymous with one another, especially since our familial ties can hold us hostage.
 
Sometimes, the familiar is dangerous and counterproductive to our progress as we attempt to follow Christ. I would also go as far as to suggest that familial ties have the power to stagnate our lives in ways that other relationships cannot. Therefore, we have to recognize that in order to be successful in our pursuit of God, we have to figure out which characteristics He entrusted to us, and which are the hindrances from ancestral lineages.
 
Lineages are very important to us because they provide clues to the outcome of our lives. Think about it. At a doctor’s appointment, they ask that patients to fill out a questionnaire about the history of their family. At the minimum, the doctor seeks information about three generations of individuals within one family.  This is not simply happenstance but highlights an understanding of the importance of familial ties. Ultimately, doctors understand that families have a lot in common including genes, environment, and livelihoods. Taken together, these may provide clues to generational ailments that could surface in a family. By investigating these patterns, healthcare professionals can determine if an individual, other family members, or even future members are susceptible to developing certain conditions.
 
If this is true in the natural it is definitely true spiritually. Think about people in your family who have distinctive commonalities. Perhaps all the men in your family die prematurely or end up in jail. Maybe all the women in your family get pregnant out of wedlock or are bitter. All of these commonalities could be clues about what has attached itself to your family lineage and what might be after you.
 
This is a hard reality. I must admit that this will not be an easy thing to combat because the normalcy of our family seduces us into the comfort of its hold. But, we have to do something distinctive if we hope to live differently. Sometimes what we don’t realize is that God, the devil, and our families are always competing for our understanding of identity and thus our destiny. These three opposing perspectives will each show you the benefits of following their path, but each will not be in your best interest.
 
Sometimes it is hard to decipher if our familial characteristics are causing us to live beneath who we were created to be. More often than not, these are also the very traits that are used to identify us as family. The battle then becomes one of deciding whether to cater to our identity in God or our parents. If I can be honest, there was a time that I had difficulty deciding between the two, which is why I chose the familial lifestyle that was most familiar. Unfortunately, this “small” choice took me down a destructive path that cost me a lot of time in the wilderness. So, I caution you to choose God! I’m telling you this because I know what it’s like to fight demons attached to my last name.
 
I descend from a line of strong black women who are single mothers. They are phenomenal women, but when I say strong, I mean strong! Again, this is a common trait, but just because it is normal in my family doesn’t mean it is right. Anything outside of the will of God or His initial plan for a thing is perverted. The operation of strength in spite of God leads to idolatry and He is clear on his position on the matter. Therefore, I want to challenge you to spend time locating the lineage commonality in your family and test that characteristic against the Bible to see if it aligns. Ask God to reveal any hindrances to your life that are a result of your familial lineage. You should record anything he shows you or anything that comes to mind. Remember, whatever is not in alignment with the Word of God is wrong no matter how normal it may seem to us.
 
While it is true that your ancestry has the ability to dictate to you the ways in which you live, when you overcome the generational curses assigned to your last name, there is a level of freedom that you will operate in. Ultimately, there is hope! Just as certain traits follow families for several generations, the Lord gives a promise in Psalm 105:8 that He remembers His covenant and promises for a thousand generations. Today, we measure a generation by twenty-five years or so, and if this understanding is applied to the scripture, it means that God’s word will be fulfilled from 25,000 years prior. I wonder how far back we would have to travel to see the original promise in our families. Would we even know to whom the promise was made? Think about the children of Israel, God made several promises to them and we are privy to the ramifications of some of them as revealed in the scriptures: wealth, virtue, influence, and force, to name a few.
 
What promises has God made to you? What promises will you see, if you obey his word and break free of the generational cycles? Think of your siblings, friends, your children, and grandchildren. They are all depending on your act of obedience and willingness to break free.
 
This is why you need to sign up for The Break The Cycle Challenge. You don’t want to be the only one in 2018 who is still haunted by the reality of their past.
 
Married & Young’s FREE 4-day “Break The Cycle” challenge starting on Monday, February 5. We are breaking the patterns off our lives NOW so we don’t repeat them later. Click HERE to sign up!
 

Categories
Physical Intimacy Single Spiritual Intimacy

The Day I Reached My Breaking Point

Written By: Jessica Dent
 
At some point or another, we all reach a breaking point where we’re forced to come to the end of ourselves. When we do come to our own end, there should be something there waiting for us, offering us another option, another way out from our former lives. If at the end of yourself, you find nothing there to usher you into something new, uncomfortable, and challenging then you will likely go back to what kept you comfortable. You would be going back into your cycle. When will it end? When will you finally want more for yourself and not keep yourself comfortable on the cushion of mediocrity? When will you realize that what shaped you in your beginning does not have to be your ending (Ecclesiastes 7:8)? The cycle that your parents groomed you in doesn’t have to be the same for you, your children, or your future spouse (2 Corinthians 5:17).
 
Since I was 15 years old, fending for myself was my way of life. If no one did it for me, then I had to do it for myself. If I needed money, I worked for it–legally of course. If my brother and I needed food, I bought it.  If the lights needed to stay on, then I took care of the bill. I was a working teenager in high school trying to maintain a household for my brother, my drug-addicted mother, and myself. I grew up with the hustle mindset which would later lead me to the worship of self and ultimately develop the spirit of pride. Sure, I believed that God existed, but seeing Him as my Father, let alone my provider? I didn’t quite know Him back then but instead, I knew of Him. I was extremely prideful and I was nothing short of an orphan, literally and spiritually, and filled to the brim with insecurities. But when you’re surviving, you’re too busy to notice that you’re bleeding along the way.
 
I was a foster child and was later adopted. My birth mother was also an addict and I never knew my father. Yes, just in case you’re asking me, both my birth and adopted mothers struggled with drug addiction abuse. Along the way though, I thought I did pretty good “keeping it all together”, and then relationships happened and my mess showed. I dove into those relationships head first and with no sobriety and you can pretty much go down the checklist to see why. I was looking for love in all the wrong places and I really mean in all the wrong people– not just romantic but in friendships and parental relationships. Nothing seemed to fit the way I desired it to, which explains why when I gave my life 100% over to Christ, the relationships that I tried to force were stripped away.
 
My lack of identity helped to cultivate my pattern of toxic relationships. During that time, I was in pursuit of the greatest love that I would ever know, but learned that nothing would compare to it once I experienced it. God was the first love that I didn’t have to fall for. All that time I was in pursuit of God but didn’t know it. Therefore, my thirst led me to the wrong things, the wrong relationships, and I kept them all past their expiration dates. It wasn’t until my mid-twenties when I realized that I was coming to the end of myself. That was when I realized that I was bleeding and in need of medical attention. The cycles that I found myself in were later introduced to The Breaker–Jesus. My future couldn’t look like what my past was. Enough was enough and I had to be broken. However, not by the hands of another, but gracefully this time by the hands of God.  If any of this speaks to you then I urge you to BREAK THE CYCLE, starting NOW! I wholeheartedly believe in what the 4-day Break the Cycle Challenge is all about and if you want to get free from the past for a healthy future and marriage, then you honestly don’t want to miss out. Your future does not have to look like your past (Philippians 3:13). Are you ready to come to the end of yourself now? Sign up HERE !

Categories
Single Spiritual Intimacy

Who Am I?: 3 Truths to Get Your Identity Rooted

Written by: Kayla Thomas
 
Have you ever looked at yourself and thought, “Who is this imposter?” “I don’t even recognize myself!” “Who am I?” “What is the meaning of my life?” “Who am I supposed to be?” These are all tough statements and questions, but they are rooted in one cause: identity crisis. When you can honestly look at yourself and not recognize who you are, or question aspects of yourself, that is a clear indicator of an internal conflict of identity. How do I know? Well, I’ve been there–many times.
 
I remember the first time I struggled with my “place” in the world, I was 14 years old and just starting high school. My mom bought me a few velour sweatsuits (the fashion at that time, thanks to Jennifer Lopez) and I wore one to school. Let me tell you, it seemed like every guy in my school had a sexual comment about me and the way I looked in that suit. It happened so often that, although it made me uncomfortable, I began to think it must be normal. This was “confirmed” by how some of my new friends would interact with guys in the school. As a way of fitting in, I would do what “my girls” were doing. If they were hugging guys in the corner, so was I. If they were poking out certain body parts to attract attention, so was I. If they were skipping class to hang out with the football team in the cafeteria, so was I. You know what the crazy thing about this was? I actually hated doing all of those things. So why did I? Because my identity was rooted in what my friends were doing rather than in what I enjoyed doing. Do you see how this could be dangerous?
 
Allow me to give you another example. Several of my friends in university were attracted to the same sex. They would often invite me to LGBT events and clubs and, while I was attracted to the opposite sex, I would go. I have to admit, I enjoyed the music and the “vibes” at these events. Eventually, I started questioning if I was attracted to the same sex as well. This started me down a dangerous path of “dabbling” with same-sex relationships. Throughout this experimentation phase, I knew something didn’t feel right. I proceeded anyway because I “knew” that if I was enjoying myself so much in the LGBT community, then my sexual orientation must align with that community as well. So what changed? I hit my version of rock bottom and a friend invited me to her church thinking it would give me some peace. Eventually, as I began learning who God said I was, I had a personal conviction that what I was doing was wrong.
 
So what does God say about me? I spent many years stuck in a cycle of “discovering” and “reshaping” who I was, or who I thought I should be. It wasn’t until I discovered these 3 biblical truths and meditated on them, that I realized who I was in Christ all along:
 

  1. I’m chosen and blameless! Ephesians 1:4 says that “Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes.” Have you ever done something to try and catch the attention of someone and it doesn’t work? Doesn’t that leave you wondering “why not me?” or “what’s wrong with me?” Well, God chose us before we could do anything to stand out to him and guess what? Before Him we stand faultless. All the mistakes we’ve made in our past, once we repent and turn back to God, are wiped clean!

 

  1. I’m an heir! Galatians 4:7 says that we are no longer slaves, but children of God —this makes us heirs! It takes an attitude adjustment to go from a slave mentality to an heir mentality. Slaves work so hard for little to nothing in return, but heirs don’t need to work for the inheritance they are to receive. Everything I do as a Christian is not to earn a “better” place in heaven; it’s to share with everyone the joy and gratitude I feel being a part of large spiritual family with a Father who loves me for who I am!

 

  1. I’m accepted! This truth shakes me to the core. Everything I did in the past, all the poor mistakes, was to be accepted by my peers —who never really accepted me, anyway! To know that I’m fully accepted by God (Romans 15:7), and I don’t have to do anything to earn it, leaves me in constant awe.

 
Not knowing who you are is a tough struggle to deal with. Friends, there is no reason why you need to continue walking out in life in a state of internal confusion. That is why the “Break the Cycle” challenge is so necessary. Thousands have already said “yes” to dedicating 4 days to break the cycles of toxic relationships, identity crisis, financial strife, and generational curses. What is stopping you from saying yes? You have everything to gain and nothing lose! Click here to take your first step to freedom. 

Categories
Physical Intimacy Single Spiritual Intimacy

You Need More Jesus, Not More Sex.

Written by: Richelle Henry
I remember staring at the shadow of his figure moving from the bed and out of the bedroom door.  All I could do was lay there and wonder, “how did I get I here?”  How in the world did my good ol’ Christian self, end up in this man’s bed?  I should have gone home! I should have told him no! I should have left when he told me to! But…I stayed. I stayed out of brokenness. I stayed out of loneliness. I stayed out of desperation. I just wanted to be held. I wanted to feel important. I wanted to feel wanted.
I can remember this day and many others like it, like they all occurred yesterday. The feelings of pseudo-comfort, shame, disgust, disappointment, and guilt are what I recall the most. It seems that the soul screams the loudest in those, “You KNEW better” scenarios. I mean, I’ve heard of boundaries. I’ve been saved all of my life. I remember the strict “courtship” rules of no phone calls after 9pm and even going on group dates. But, that advice didn’t work for me. I still made the decision to act upon a desire that left me feeling unredeemable and ultimately separated from God.
You’re probably asking yourself as I did in the moments stated above–Where do I go from here? Do I mourn and grieve over the fact that I knew better and still chose to disobey? I knew the scripture that said I should flee from sexual immorality (See 1 Corinthians 6:18)—but my wounded heart had me making strides towards it instead. Do I run back and keep engaging in the act because, “hey, I already fell? I already have to repent.” Or do I get out of this bed, go before the Lord and be as totally transparent as possible in total confidence that He will hear me and answer?
I suggest that you choose the latter of all these options.
I know that you’re probably feeling really disappointed in yourself. The last time was supposed to be the last time—right? I hear you and can feel the shame that you’re probably carrying. But let me encourage you with this—the Father loves you and longs to restore you. When you think of the word restoration, what comes to mind? Repairing? Making whole? Well, the word “restore” means to bring something back to its original condition due to its current condition being either disfigured, used, or altered. Don’t you know that the Lord can bring you back to the version He intended on you becoming—before you fell. But you must be open and completely transparent with Him throughout the process. You’re probably asking, “what is there to be honest about? He’s God. He should know!” Yes, you’re correct. However—the transparency isn’t for God—it’s for you. It’s for you to become aware of the roots, reasons, and decisions along the way that may have caused you to fall. Transparency heightens your awareness so that you can better assess your heart and the manner in which it responds to crisis, traumas, setbacks, and even temptations.
Let’s start here. Why did you fall? What caused you to make the decision to engage in another one-night stand, “friend with benefits,” or engage in another “we’ll repent about this later..” moment?  Your reasons are bigger than just wanting to feel good. While that may be some of the reason, remember that even pleasure has a motive. I repeat—pleasure ALWAYS has a motive.  Find out what may have triggered you. What were you thinking of when you made the decision? Was it a bad day? A moment where thoughts of low self-esteem were clouding your mind? Were you wanting to feel valued or appreciated? Struggling with issues of rejection? Feeling unwanted? Loneliness? Regardless of what your reason was, remember that in these moments, it was your soul crying out for Christ, not just your body longing to be touched.
You see, when we talk about sexual sin—it’s so much bigger than a moment—it’s a decision. It’s a decision that places sexual pleasure and the like on a pedestal of “better,” over Christ’s ability to truly fulfill. Christ and Christ alone satisfies (See Psalm 62:1). He’s the only one that can come and drown loneliness, rejection, abandonment, insecurity, low self-esteem, hurt, or sadness with the currents of His love. When we make the decision to tread in the waters of sexual sin—we run the risk of drowning in that which we are meant to rise above—the snares and traps of sin. But with Christ and in Christ, you are well-equipped to deal with sexual sin—because He’s already overcome it (See 1 Corinthians 15:56-57)
Choose today to hit ignore, cancel that standing appointment on Friday night, and make a new decision. Make the decision to be completely open before the Lord and ask Him to fill you. Go to Him in confidence that He will cleanse you (See Psalm 51:2), empower you to resist temptation (See 1 Corinthians 10:13), and will ultimately fill and satisfy the voids within you (See Psalm 107:9).
“Come back to me, you wayward people. I want to cure your waywardness. Say, ‘Here we are. We come to you because you are the LORD our God.”- Jeremiah 3:22
His embrace and love alone can fill those longings—not another. Run to Him, instead.
 
LISTEN! Don’t forget to Join me and thousands of others on Married & Young’s FREE 4-day “Break The Cycle” challenge starting on Monday, February 5. We are breaking the patterns OFF our lives NOW, so we don’t repeat them later. Click HERE to sign up!

Categories
Dating/Courting Home

Why You Should Stop Waiting?

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Why You Should Stop Waiting?

It seems like the dawn of day will never come, well at least with me it does when the agonizing diminishing minutes of waiting in the Starbucks line drag on for what seems like an eternity. You scroll through the news feed, you check your Instagram, you take a selfie or two (don’t even try to deny that you haven’t done this its just sad) and sweetly jam to whatever blasts its way into the speakers of your car. Waiting.
Then you finally reach the glorious window to grab the drink you just felt like you went through a marathon of tribulation to get! It tastes just as good as you thought it would and you realize you carried on with life in the waiting. You continued to be. The drink came just like you knew it would without a second thought. And all the while you carried on living life in its entirety because of one great assurance; the reward for the wait would be there in the end.
Now I know that is an infinitely grand symbolism to relate the relationship woes of singles to the steamed Starbucks lattes we savor, but stay with me I promise I’ll whip up a delight for you in the end.
WAITING
Webster’s states the word waiting as a period of time spent inactive or stationary. For many singles the ideology behind being in the season of waiting means being inactive or dormant to life. We should just await the arrival of his or her significant other, or the the next season of life when in reality Jesus came to “give life and life more abundantly.” Jesus didn’t sacrifice himself in hopes that during the “waiting” season of our lives we would expel ourself from living it.
In 2 Peter 1:2 it states, “Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God.” God wants us to have peace in the grace of the season He has us in. When we are celebrating in the season of our singleness He means for us to stop waiting in the literal since of giving up life and wait in the beauty of His assurance, the assurance of the great reward awaiting in the end of our season.Whether that is moving into a new season of singleness, a new relationship, a new place to live etc. When we stop looking to the next season to make life better and start seeing Jesus for all He has and is in the now. We settle in the peace of the grace of the present. 
SEEING SINGLENESS
Singleness is to be lived. Not waited out in agony of finally being done like a math test or credit card application. Singleness isn’t about the pursuit of “finding the one.” Singleness is to be savored like a Starbucks frappe on a hot day. It’s to be lived in its fullness to grasp the great grace; knowledge and truth the Lord wants to extend to us.
When the choice to choose forever with the right person does come, (if marriage is even the end result for what God has for you) that its viewed through a season which was lived out in love and light not one waited out in disillusion and depression.
Singleness isn’t to be viewed with bitterness and sarcasm such as, “All good things come to those who wait”, I sure hope so because if I’m waiting for bad this is going to suck. “Why are you still single”, because becoming a magician was taken? Singleness should be a place on the journey where books are read, road trips are made at midnight, community is at your core, relationships with sisters or brothers in Christ are deepened, laughter is abundantly more, where dreams are drawn up and accomplished by the droves. Stop waiting for life to start or force people into a place which hasn’t yet been established for them in your life because you are so tired and exhausted of the process we’ve deemed waiting.
STOP WAITING
Hear me out please, I am not saying throw in the towel and go completely off the cliff of your foundations and cornerstone of standards. I am saying though stop claiming singleness as a dead, dormant dry season meant to be the end of all ends until you get to the mountain top. Instead change the viewpoint of singleness to be lived out not waited out. Let life be enjoyed, let God become more savored and let love most of all nourish and grow in the living out of the waiting.
“I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully? Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Ephesians 3:16-19
This verse to me is the motto us as singles should be holding onto in a season where Christ longs to make His home in our hearts and bring us to trusting in Him even more for filling the space where our future mate will capture one day. But in the mean time letting God’s love grow deep in us to keep us faithful and strong. And this is the very best part so we can have fullness of life! A season of waiting isn’t death. It wasn’t meant to wait out with dread and expectations of lack. It is meant to be lived in the fullness of life, to be enjoyed to the utmost all the while increasing our faith and hope in the assurance of the end result that God is ever faithful in His promises to us!

 If we are just waiting to wait out the waiting we are waiting our life to death.

And when we finally start living the waiting fades in time and we soon realize the reward came just at the perfect time and we arrive to the window of goodness, exceedingly abundantly more than we could ask or imagine. A future full of promise and the reward of all that our sweet heavenly Father promised us. And it just so happens to beat out a good Starbucks drink any day. Don’t you think?
 
Written By: Angela Groce

Categories
Dating/Courting Home Marriage

Let Your Husband Find You: Part 1

It was four years ago when I expressed to my pastor that I was in love and we were going to be married. He insisted that my husband-to-be only told me those words to sleep with me. It was at that point that I knew I didn’t have a counselor. I felt alone. How dare he try to take away my blessing? That day I walked away feeling like I was in a fight for my life. I knew that his feelings were that of many people who could not understand finding happiness in just 6 months.
A year and a half before meeting the love of my life, I sat in a bath tub with tears flowing down my face. I was suffering from a broken heart. My ex-boyfriend cheated on me again and this time got a girl pregnant. I felt like dying. Was he the best that I could do?
As I cried, I recalled a sermon that I heard just a few weeks before. He met a young woman who was desperate for a husband. He explained to her that her husband will find her.
“The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD.” Psalm 18:22
As women, we cannot force relationships because its not our calling to. God created man FIRST meaning it is his duty to initiate the relationship. When he finds his wife he finds a good thing because he has found the missing part of HIM.
The pastor then instructed her to make a list of all of the qualities she desired in a husband and said that in a year, she will be married. The word of God says, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” Matthew 7:7 It is when we ask, and have faith that God will answer us. We may not receive what we want exactly when we want it but in His time we will receive our answer and possibly our husband.
The young lady didn’t believe the pastor but by the next year not only was she married, she had a child.
God knows exactly what we need and when we need it. It is not up to us or anyone else to tell us what our calling or a blessings are. When we make the conscious decision to talk to God about our future, we are relinquishing the right to take control. “Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” (Psalm 55:22). If we put our total trust in Him, He will not steer us wrong, whether it be in relationships or life in general.
Following the pastor’s advice, I was able to marry the man that I requested. I rebuked every negative person that tried to advise me against following God’s word for my life including my pastor. We cannot let anyone stop us from obtaining what is rightfully ours.

Categories
Marriage

Obedience Brings the Blessing

Has God ever given you a word or told you to do something that seemed so crazy that you were afraid to tell your spouse? After a fight with my supervisor, God told me to leave my job. How could I face my family if I leave my secure position, my health insurance and my pay check? It just didn’t make any sense. I was convinced that it was my subconscious but God sent me signs. He even had strangers talk to me! They all brought me the same word: “God is ready to elevate you; you need to do whatever He is telling you to do.” I finally decided to tell him. I was afraid of his reaction but he simply said, “I’ll support any decision that you make.” I couldn’t believe my ears. Here’s what I learned:

  • Your blessing is intertwined with your spouse’s.

“26 See, I am setting before you today a blessing and a curse— 27 the blessing if you obey the commands of the Lord your God that I am giving you today…” Deuteronomy 11:26-27
If your spouse receives a word from God, don’t discourage him/her from listening. God will never tell your spouse to do something without already making preparations for you and your family. Your spouse will never make a decision that will purposely hurt your family. He/she is just as thoughtful and scared as you are but their obedience as well as your obedience (by supporting your spouse) will bring a blessing.
If you receive a word, trust your spouse enough to talk to him/her. Even if you don’t receive the response that you want, God will create an opportunity for your spouse to be in-sync with you. Whenever my husband’s faith in my decision wavered, I asked him to pray for me but it was really for him. I needed him to be on-board with God’s word.

  • Fighting God will only lead to destruction.

“…28the curse if you disobey the commands of the Lord your God and turn from the way that I command you today…” Deuteronomy 11:28
As obedience brings a blessing likewise disobedience brings a curse. Not all Christians can identify the voice of God. If you are reverenced enough to do so and refuse to listen not only will you forfeit your blessing, you bring a curse on both you and your family. When I heard from God, I should have listened immediately. While I was questioning His authority over my life, my job became increasingly unsafe for me physically, mentally, and spiritually. My husband was also struggling with his job at the same time. He was being lied on and almost lost his position. We could not understand why this was happening to the two of us. It wasn’t until I decided that I will leave, that my husband was released from the bondage of his job. At the time, I didn’t actually leave yet but I let my job know that I would be leaving at the end of the year. I was partially listening…I tried to appease God and myself but, of course, I can’t outsmart God! I became an angry person who was unable to do her job. God used my coworker to reveal to me what I was doing wrong. I’ll never forget what she said “You are hindering your husband’s blessing.” I fell a part. That Sunday, I received my breakthrough at church and I haven’t been back to my job since. Opportunities and ideas have opened up for us that I know would not have if I continued to ignore God.
Obedience to God means having faith in Him and sometimes faith in your spouse. Trust him/her enough to talk about the direction that God is leading you in. Don’t be afraid to allow God to take control of your life because it will lead to greater opportunities for you and your family.

Categories
Dating/Courting Engaged Home

Tear Up Your Wishlist: The Two Things You Should Look For in a Potential Spouse

Categories
Marriage

3 Words your husband needs to Hear You Say

I Trust You
Your husband needs to know without a shadow of a doubt you TRUST him.  Not just trusting in him, when he is doing something that you feel is right. But trusting in him even when you are uncomfortable.  You need to trust the God in him, and trust that he hears from God clearly, even when you do not understand. That’s why praying for your husband is so important. Prayer allows you to keep the right perspective towards your husband and marriage.
 
I Respect You
Men need to know that they are valued just like any human being. In my marriage, ways that I respect my husband is by making sure that I honor the budget that we have set out financially each month, not talking bad about him to others, honoring his wisdom, and allowing him to lead. I honor the man that he is and will become. My level of respect is not dependent upon his actions, but upon my love for him through the eyes of my Heavenly Father.
 
I Love You:
I know you love your husband, and you show it to him on a daily basis by being an amazing wife and mother. But he needs to hear you say it verbally as well. No man is “too tough” to resist those three words from his beautiful lady!  One thing I would like to learn in the future, is how to say “I Love You” in different languages and share them with my husband at spontaneous moments throughout our day. He may be a bit shocked or taken back in the beginning, but I’m sure once he finds out what I said he will be gleaning with joy!
 
I am learning daily through my marriage that it takes two yielded hearts towards God and one another to have a successful marriage.  These three words have blessed me tremendously in how I respond, love and care for my husband.  I truly believe that as I Trust, Respect and Love my husband that God will continue to fill me up with more and more of his revelation on how to be the wife, my husband Jamal is worthy to receive.

Categories
Marriage

Why Your Spouse Should Get the Leftovers