Tag: christian

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Dating/Courting Engaged Home Marriage Physical Intimacy

5 Quick Ways to Jumpstart to a Healthy Lifestyle

Many times I paid to write articles hear people say, ” I can’t afford to buy whole/organic foods” or “I don’t have enough time to work out and get fit/healthy.”

I know in this part of the Western World, eating unhealthy foods and skipping the gym is so much easier and convenient, but I promise you: the hospital bills, the medicine script, the exhausted and overworked body and ultimately the sickness is WAY more expensive than taking steps to living in wholeness NOW.

Here’s a great way to start:

1.

Recruit help!

Bring a friend in on your choice to live healthy and stay accountable!

cheap price cialis

It’s so much easier and way more fun to do it with someone else.

 

2. Get educated!

Watch a documentary: Food Matters, Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead, or Forks over Knives are great Netflix movies!

 

3. Make some changes!

Cut something out (soda, fast food, eating late) and replace it with something else (water, home-cooked meal, veggie snack).

 

4. Discipline your body!

Sign up to the gym, a cross fit class, a home workout routine, running, biking… whatever! Do something that will burn fat, release endorphins and make you feel good about yourself!

 

5. Love yourself:

Value your body enough to give it what it needs to work properly! This is going to make you a healthy, happy you! You are worth the investment! Don’t just settle for what McDonalds offers you! Your body needs nutrients! So give it what it needs to be healthy!

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Dating/Courting Engaged Single

4 Benefits To Waiting Until Marriage To Have Sex

 

A popular pastor that I follow quotes that sex can be considered 3 things, “gross, god, or a gift.” I believe this to be very true in our day due to how sex is overrated outside of marriage and underrated within marriage.  It is gross to those that have been taught their entire life that sex is bad and will cause people to look at you differently.  For some it can be made a god if its not taught on biblically from God’s original intent.  But, it is God’s purpose for sex to be seen as a gift.  Sex is a gift to be shared with your spouse within the confines of marriage.   My wife and I by the grace of God were both virgins at the moment of saying, “I Do”, to one another on our wedding day.

Here are 4 benefits of waiting until marriage to have sex.

1. Keeps God at the center of your relationship
Honoring God in our relationship was my wife and I’s supreme goal and saying no to sex made that goal easily accomplishable. God is the inventor of marriage, which means you need Him in your marriage in order to have a healthy one.  The stages before you say “I Do’ are the most crucial for laying a solid foundation for your marriage.  Establishing a no sex boundary will keep you focused on the important aspects of a courting relationship.  Yes, the desire to have sex will come, but with God you will be able to have the strength to resist temptation.  Trusting God in your relationship will help you to make a confident decision when you feel that person may be the one you desire to marry.
 2. Learn how to talk it out before you walk it out
Communication has always been and will always be one of the key components of a healthy relationship.  My wife and I had a long distance relationship so majority of our time spent before marriage was over Skype or on the phone.  It was one of the hardest things I had ever done, but it was so worth it.  We really learned each other on so many levels, and when we did see one another the boundaries we had set in place kept us focused on enjoying one another communicatively versus physically.  Early sexual satisfaction in a relationship delays you from discovering key areas of the relationship such as ability to commit, compatibility, and agreement on future goals.
 3. Protects you from being attached before you say “I Do”.
There are only a few things that can attach you to someone for the rest of your life and two of those is a child together and sex. Children are a blessing from the Lord, but can also be a challenge to raise in hard circumstances.  Protect yourself from this by agreeing to wait until marriage to have sex. Another attachment that can form through sexual activity is a soul tie.  Sex was created by God to tie that couple together forever, but when done outside of marriage the same effect happens.  But, now it’s an illegitimate tie versus a covenantal tie.  Sex outside of marriage may feel good in that moment, but thats all you will be left with after that night is over.  If the relationship doesn’t work out, then breaking it off will be much easier if there hasn’t been a spiritual soul tie through sex.
 4. Incomparable sex within marriage.
You can guarantee that if you abstain from having sex during your courting stage that the value you place upon one another will last your entire life.  This value adds volumes to your sex life in marriage. Study shows that those that wait to have sex are happier in the long run. I do not look at my wife like a piece of meat, but a treasure worth being handled with tender care.  I proved that to her by denying my flesh, and leading the stand for our purity.  Our wedding night was the most beautiful encounter as we exchanged our gifts to another.  Our marriage was established on a sure foundation with God in the center of it all. Married people have the best sex!
 
Even if you have already had sex in a previous relationship that doesn’t disqualify you from making the decision to abstain until you are married.  If you are in a sexually active relationship now, but desire to change things then pray for God to give you wisdom as you approach your girl/boyfriend. I guarantee you it will be worth it in the end.

Categories
Marriage

Learning Your Spouse's Language

I’m sure you’ve heard people say men are from Mars and women are from Venus.  Eh, I disagree.  Those are two completely different planets so in reality if men and women were from different planets the differences would be much greater than just communication.  If we were from different planets we probably couldn’t even reproduce.  It’s more like men are from New York and women are from LA or men are from England and women are from the US.  We’re all speaking English, we’re just speaking in different dialects.  Because the differences can be so vast, it may feel like two different languages.  The trick is to embrace each other’s dialect and resist any urge to classify any of the differences as deficiencies.  Both approaches to the expression of English are equally valid and neither should be altered.  They should be allowed to stay in their purest form.
For instance, if a husband recognizes that his wife requires much more detail than he would normally share he should be patient in learning how to do so.  While if a wife recognizes that her husband’s needs short, bottom line information, she should also be patient in learning to do so.  Of course these are stereotypical examples and your situation could be different so be sure to tailor your approach to your spouse’s needs.
While studying abroad in Mexico I learned a strategy that may prove to be very effective in learning a new language.  I had a friend who was trying to learn English while I was trying to learn Spanish.  I would speak to them in Spanish and they would respond in English to see if we understood each other.  We would then switch languages in order to ensure that we could hear and speak each language properly.  This is how to approach learning to communicate with your spouse.  I’ve been learning to speak “Melissa” this way for seven years.
Just this past Valentines I had an opportunity to practice my “Melissa”.    It was Melissa’s turn to plan our Valentines and typically the activity planned is the gift to both of us, but I decided I would still give Melissa a gift.   I know Melissa loves candy so I decided to get a gift bag and put a bunch of candy in it and I would also drive around town and “collect” some flowers from the apartment complexes in our area since flowers were not in the budget.  I went to the store and purchased the gift bag and the candy.  I decided it would be cool to take all of the candy out of the wrappers and dump them into the bag. This way Melissa could just sit back and enjoy the candy without having to wrestle with the wrappers (I am so considerate).  Now it was time to drive around and collect some flowers, but I couldn’t do it.  The Holy Spirit wouldn’t let me.  Besides, I’d be embarrassed if I was on the news involved in a high-speed chase over some stolen flowers.
I surprised Melissa with the bag of candy and she loved it.  Now It was time to explain to her the story behind the bag of candy. I had two choices, I could speak to her in “Joel” or speak to her in “Melissa”.  If I spoke to her in Joel I would say, “I bought you some candy because you like candy and I was going to give you some flowers but that didn’t work out.”  That would be too easy and I’d just be being lazy if I did that.  So of course I chose to speak in “Melissa”.  I gave her a very detailed version of the story and she loved every detail.  She loved the idea that I took the candy out of the wrapper just for her and she was relieved that I didn’t collect any flowers, but she thought the gesture was nice.
Melissa and I are not yet fluent in each other’s languages.  We often regress to our native tongues.  Every time we choose to speak in our second tongue it’s exciting and it draws us closer to each other.  We find ourselves and each other in the translation.  I leave you with this quote from Johann Wolfgang von Goeth “Those who know nothing of foreign languages know nothing of their own.”

Categories
Home

5 Questions To Ask Yourself While Waiting For Your Spouse

Let’s define the word “wait”.
Merriam-Webster.com defines it as, “: to stay in a place until an expected event happens, until someone arrives, until it is your turn to do something, etc.: to not do something until something else happens: to remain in a state in which you expect or hope that something will happen soon”.
 
The first picture that comes to mind of someone waiting for marriage is a scene of an individual at a bus stop with bags filled with expectations, hopes and desires to be fulfilled by someone else. The perception of marriage can sometimes take the form in an individual’s mind that life starts when I say “I Do”.  I would like to suggest for you to get off the bus stop, unpack your bags and to get in a car to begin the journey on the road of life.
While waiting, there are some parameters that the Bible states that we should stay within. They are not rules to control you but to keep your heart safe from strife and confusion. 1 Corinthians 6: 18-20 talks about fleeing fornication and that our bodies are a temple of the Holy Spirit and that we are not our own. Our body is not to be given to someone or something that does not glorify God; it does not belong to us. Giving it to someone else outside the confines of marriage really defines us as thief and stealing something that does not belong to us in the first place.
 
If you are a virgin, remain until you are married. It is a gift that your future mate will honor and cherish. If you are having sex, there is no condemnation but stop. Find accountability partners that will encourage you to walk in holiness and provide strategies to help you to remain pure.
1 Thess 4:3-5; Rom 6:11-14; Eph 5:3
Marriage is a beautiful union between one man and one woman created by God for the purpose of serving each other. In order to do this well, a solidification of one’s identity in Christ prior to entering in to the life-long commitment is needed. The season of being unmarried is not at all a time to be stagnant and sitting at home watching love stories on Lifetime, but is a short window of opportunity for you to develop and prepare ourselves for our spouse.
Ask yourself these 5 questions:
1. Who am I? It would be a little awkward to sit in front of someone that you are potentially interested in and unable to answer this question. Pray and ask God for definition. Exploration of who you are is not an overnight process and evolves over time.
2. In what ways can I serve others? Working in your local church or volunteering your abilities to the service of others not only builds character but helps you understand how to connect with people.
3. What do my finances look like? How you spend money is a direct reflection of the ability to prepare. Take some finance seminars, learn about investments, have an emergency fund; some may even be able to buy a house and an investment property.
4. Who are my friends? True friendships among men and women during the unmarried season are there to make you stronger and encourage you in your walk with the Lord.
5. What activities do I like to do? What hobbies do I have? Where would I like to travel? Once defined, do them. There is a level of freedom that can be experienced during the unmarried season that you can not only dream about but can also achieve.
 
Being unmarried is a season of discovery and joy to establish friendships and trying new things. An opportunity to build your character and to allow the Holy Spirit to shape you in to a vessel that is clean and able to be used for the advancement of the Kingdom. It is a short segment of life that may feel like forever while you are in it, but remember marriage is a lifetime. So my friends, don’t just stand there… get moving and wait until the expected end happens.
INS
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