Category: Dating/Courting

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Dating/Courting Home Single

3 Keys to Entering Your Next Relationship

Portrait of a young african woman sitting at outdoor cafe using cellphone

Key 1 – God’s Timing is Right
Ecclesiastes 3:1 “There is a season (a time appointed) for everything and a time for every delight and event or purpose under heaven-”
I am a firm believer in the times and seasons the Bible refers to. It is so important that you don’t move outside of God’s timing, and this applies to relationships as well. Moving at your own pace and not God’s pace or the direction of His will can cause damaging circumstances to develop.
For example, a potentially good relationship may not work out if it comes into existence prematurely. Yes, I said it! Moving outside of God’s timing can cause a blessing to turn into a curse.
Let’s say you feel fully prepared to be in a relationship but God knows you still hold a bit of unforgiveness in your heart towards your ex. More than likely, God isn’t going to open the door to a new relationship until that area of yourself has completely healed.
Why? Because you will certainly make it very hard for a new relationship to flourish if, by way of unforgiveness, your heart is still connected to your last relationship. You see, God knows and sees what we don’t know and see. It’s better to trust Him than to move outside of His plan and timing.
Key 2 – Don’t Force It
Proverbs 19:21 “Many plans are in a man’s mind, But it is the Lord’s purpose for him that will stand (be carried out).”
One thing I’ve learned throughout my life is to never force anything. Hence the popular saying “If the shoe fits, wear it,” but I say, “If the shoes doesn’t fit, DON’T wear it.” I like to apply this principle to relationships as well; forcing something “to be” that has “this is not the one for you” written all over it is only going to damage you as a person.
There’s the possibility of feeling rejected or becoming brokenhearted. Certain insecurities can form if the person you’re forcing a relationship with is interested in someone else. It is even possible that you may feel unimportant or as though you’re not a priority.
I know this person may have all the qualities listed on your list, but if God says “no,” it’s a no. If the relationship has more exhausting days than joyful days, you’re probably staying in something that is simply not for you.
If you’re one who is forcing a relationship to work when you know deep down in your heart that it’s time to move on and let go, pray and ask God for clarity.
Key 3 – Prepare Yourself
Proverbs 24:27 “Prepare your work outside and get it ready for yourself in the field; afterward build your house and establish a home.”
A very wise person prepares themselves for future seasons of life. Marriage is serious, and dating/courting is the first phase in determining whom you will marry. Therefore, it’s important that you prepare not only for marriage, but for your dating/courting season as well.
Preparation should include understanding what boundaries are, how to overcome temptation (which will come), how to identity red flags, what is permissible in a relationship and what simply is not. All these things plus more are important to know about before you let yourself enter a relationship.
Most people prepare only for marriage and forget the important phase of dating/courting that comes before it.
Always remember these three pointers – Timing, Don’t Force it, and Prepare!
Raven

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Dating/Courting Engaged Single

7 Actions to Take When Your Heart is Hurting

beautiful woman at home with heart for valentine's day

Nearly a decade ago, my heart took a beating when the guy I was in a relationship with told me his feelings had changed and that he was dating someone else. I was sure I had done everything I thought I was supposed to do to avoid this kind of result- I was pursuing God above all else, I’d been prayerful, I’d waited for confirmations before moving forward, I made it clear it needed to be a God-centered relationship and I’d involved trustworthy friends and family in the process. There was no doubt in my mind that the Lord’s approval was all over this …until this happened!
I vividly remember the day I had this conversation and the deep hurt I experienced afterward. I desperately just wanted to get away from the pain, to forget about him, to forget about the whole thing in general, to be free from the memories we had and the resounding promises he’d made and then broke.
In the days to come, I would put a worship song on repeat: I Have Found by Kim Walker-Smith. The chorus goes like this: ‘You are all I want, You are all I need, everything my heart could hope for. We are longing for the glory of the Lord, because we know there’s so much more.” I knew I didn’t believe those words then, but I genuinely wanted to and found an incredible peace in listening to them.
Fast forward to now… I recently was at a worship service and we sang that exact same song. Tears rolled down my face as I realized – I BELIEVE WHAT I’M SINGING! I can say that I am now at a place where I truly believe that the goodness of God surpasses anything this life has to offer. I don’t have all the answers, but I know that I wouldn’t have gotten to that point without doing some specific things:
 1.  Focused on what I was grateful for
-After this happened, I got so sick of complaining and asking the Lord for things, that I decided to commit a month to only journaling about what I was thankful for. It completely transformed my heart! Because my focus was on what was good in my life, instead of what was negative, suddenly I couldn’t help but feel joy about what was happening.
 2. Drew near to God instead of pulling away
-I distinctly remember the moment I was faced with deciding if I would allow God to be a part of what I was experiencing or push him away because He ‘could have done something about it,’ or because He ‘broke my trust.’ I put those in quotations because they are thoughts I’ve had, and I’ve heard other people vocalize…but aren’t necessarily true. It’s interesting how we want to give up the gift of free will only when we go through a hard time. I chose the first option, and am forever thankful I did. Choosing to draw close to the Father set me on a life-giving path that has led to so many adventures I couldn’t have dreamed of.
3.  Worshipped
-Worship has a similar effect to being grateful…it changes your heart in the midst of circumstances. Oftentimes we can’t control our circumstances, but if our heart is right we can experience contentedness even if our world feels like it’s falling apart.

  • Became a part of a community that built me up
    -Find friends and family that will help you get healed up. If your current community spends more time caring about what’s going wrong, it’s going to be difficult to view the Father as the perfect One He is. Pay attention to how your community is influencing you, and look for one that gives you life.
  • Ask
    -Ask the Lord to teach you what it means for Him to be “enough.” He is a relational God and loves to interact with us. If He says He is the way to true life, then He IS and would love to show you how!
  • Discovered what it means to be a child of God, instead of a slave
    -This was pivotal for me in my process of desiring God above all else. When you know you’re loved and a son/daughter of the King of kings, it makes it easier to love yourself and in turn, others…ESPECIALLY the Lord.
  • Declared God’s promises over my life
    -Find scripture that is relevant to your situation or to what you want to see happen. Speaking it out loud has great power! God spoke and the entire universe was created… He clearly has a value for speaking what you want to see even when it’s not there!

God created us to experience fullness in Him. And fullness in Him means that we get to experience what life is truly meant to be! In my experience, finding out what it means to say ‘He is enough’ is completely worth fighting for.

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Dating/Courting Single

3 Benefits of Seriously Dating in College

Young couple in love in town sitting on stairs, holding hands

Although it seems counter-cultural to discuss the possibility of marriage during your college years, I believe the lack of dating intentionally during this time frame is part of the reason people are getting married later in life. As individuals graduate from college and start to look for that special someone to settle down with, they are encountering challenges in meeting new people to even consider dating!
Coming from a Christian university it seemed to be ALL that was talked about, to the point that you felt shamed if you did come to school seeking a spouse. How could you come to school with the classic “ring by spring” mentality?!
Well, today I come to challenge the negative perspective on seeking a spouse in your college years. Here are some benefits to seriously dating in college.
 
1.  There are the most people your age and in similar walks of life, all concentrated in one location.
 
Talking with my friends post college, it almost seems IMPOSSIBLE to meet new friends – let alone potential dating candidates – anywhere other than a bar or the latest dating app. Understand that college is a time in your life where you have immediate access and ease of ability to meet new people.

  • Join a club.
  • Try intramural sports.
  • Hang out in the quad.
  • Talk to people in your class.

Chances are you are bound to click with at least one person, and you never know the friendships you may form, or the people you may meet through that one connection.
 
 2. It is a time of self-discovery and self-actualization.
 
For many individuals, college is their first time on their own. It’s the first time they have really been placed in an environment where they are forced to confront what is important to them: what they value, where they want to go in life, and who they want to be. Okay, maybe that’s a little deep for some of our college freshmen [and underclassmen] out there, but you get the point. Often during this time you start to realize values that are important to you that would be important for a significant other to share.
 
3. There is a higher probability of finding someone who shares your morals and values.
 
This point may resonate more to those that attend a Christian or faith-based university. But what I am getting at is the following: if your faith is important to you, and you want it to be the basis of your relationship, going to a Christian university will most likely improve the probability of finding a significant other that feels the same way and there is no shame in that. If you want to learn how to play basketball you don’t show up at a soccer field. Decide what is important to you and seek it out. Don’t settle on your top values on fear of not finding someone else.
Of course, college is not all about finding a spouse, but it was an added bonus I was able to take along with my bachelor’s degree and am very thankful for that. Some people may not be mature enough to even pursue the idea of marriage at this time, and that is okay too. Be honest with yourself about where you are in life and if you are truly happy. Remember – finding a spouse is not going to complete you, or make you happier. You have to be content and love who you are before you can love someone else.

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Dating/Courting Engaged Physical Intimacy Single Spiritual Intimacy

Three Signs You’re Ignoring That Your Relationship is Wrong

Years ago, when I was younger (too young), I was in a relationship with a girl of a different faith. Despite our different beliefs, we got along wonderfully. We made one another laugh, we encouraged each other when we were down, and we left God completely out of the relationship.
On a side note, “missionary dating” is not a thing. It is a distraction and an excuse for you to suppress the Holy Spirit. You hope that, by some miracle, your “light” for Jesus will draw them home, as you “minister” to him or her by leading them on. Let’s stop that.
Now, back to my story. One evening, I was home alone. The wind was howling, the freezing rain was pelting the windows, and the winter air was wafting under the door, and I had some scented candles lit for some ambiance.
I had just had a disagreement with my parents about this girl I was seeing who didn’t love Jesus. In spite of all of my reasoning, I just could not get that argument out of my head. To distract myself, I turned on the TV. The first channel that popped up was a Christian broadcasting channel. The first words that came out of that pastor’s mouth were something along the lines of, “You know when you’re disobeying God, so drop that sin, repent, and He will restore you!”
I glared at the TV and shot back, “I am not breaking up with Rebekah!” Instantly, the thunder quaked, the TV shut off, and a breeze blew through my living room, snuffing out the candles. The feeling of conviction and holy fear was overwhelming.
I broke it off with Rebekah.
Maybe you’ve been where I was, or know someone in that situation.
Stop assuming God is in your relationship if you have these three red flags:

  1. He or she draws out your sexuality over your sanctification. It was extremely easy to “shelf” my Christianity, because Rebekah knew what a teenage boy was after, and I had never been kissed. The human sex drive is a powerful function that God created, for marriage. The world wants us to sell out for a moment of pleasure. If this relationship ever—whether because of infatuation, sexual desire, or mere distraction—causes you to forget and abandon your First Love, God is not glorified, and this relationship is not from Him.
  2. You find yourself batting away caution on a regular basis. I’ve had it both ways: good and bad, in terms of relationships. With this ungodly relationship, I would enjoy being with this girl, laugh all the way home, and frown as I drifted off to sleep. When I was with the girl who is now my wife, we would worship together in the car; I would cover her and champion purity in our relationship, and I would go to bed at night, feeling closer to my First Love because of Sarah. If you are swatting at foreboding, convicting thoughts, you are in danger of hardening your heart and suppressing the Holy Spirit’s leading.
  3. Family, friends, and spiritual leaders warn you of the dangers of the relationship. Whether by mere outside perspective, spiritual discernment, or recalling their own past experiences, the godly people in your life who voice some red flags about your relationship are valid voices. They aren’t infatuated with the person, so they aren’t under the influence of adrenaline, dopamine, and serotonin (the chemicals released in your brain when you fall in love).

God renews our minds to want what He wants. And it is so good. Please, don’t sell yourself short. Save yourself for Jesus and watch as He shapes your desires into un-shakeable standards, and then provides the mate to meet those standards!

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Dating/Courting Home Single

How Most Christians Kill Their Future Before it Begins

No matter the relationship status, most people have a desire for more. Be it desiring to date, to be engaged, to be married, to have children or to be pursued by your love who no longer pays as much attention to you. It’s natural to have a desire for “what comes next”.
As Christians, we know the importance of praying ourselves through our disappointment, but for some of us (myself included) when things don’t change fast enough, take matters into our own hands. We TRY to become GOD over our own situation, not realizing we are tying the hands of the one and only ALLLLLLLLL-knowing God.
I can remember telling God “Since you are having a hard time finding me a man, I’ll help you!” The season to follow was THEE worst season of my life. From heartache to regret, my “playing God” caused me many sleepless nights; all because I couldn’t rest in the fact that God knew what he was doing.
James 1:13-15 lets us know what happens when we give in to our own desires, we sin, and ultimately our sin leads to death. Death could be natural and/or spiritual! You could potentially kill the promise God made; you can actually forfeit the blessing God has for you by giving into your right now desire (just ask Moses).
As I approach the next season of desire, I’m reminded that God is all knowing and HE, in his timing, will reveal all things to me. He, in his timing, will make all things work together for my good. He, in his timing, will bless me beyond measures in this season. I’ve made a conscious decision to rest in God’s plan for my life, as I remember what it’s like to step outside of His grace and try to make things happen. Simply put, they fall apart.
A preacher from Louisiana broke Jeremiah 29:11 down like I’d never heard it. He said “Most people quote Jeremiah 29:11 religiously, but they fail to truly embrace the scripture. When God said, “For I know the plans I have for you… he meant it. Christians sometime take ownership of the “I”, ultimately causing the real “I” to step back!” Once I received this knowledge, I became accountable to it.
Now that you know, you’re accountable to this information as well! Now that you know better (or have been reminded), you must do better at letting God be God and the Lord of your situation…uninterrupted by you!
With Love,
Shannon Cheri Colar

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Communication Dating/Courting Marriage Single Spiritual Intimacy

Three Qualities of a Marriage Built to Last

Exotic african bride and groom holding hands on the terrace.

I remember being where you are—watching married couples interact and imagining myself in that situation. One day. One day that may be me. As I was courting the girl I loved, who is now my wife, I consumed any and all material I could find about marriage. Young singles often take the “marriage buffet line:” picking and choosing the good and the bad from among the thousands of relationships on display before their eyes.
As a young single, I would attend weddings and overhear the bride telling their story to her friends, as they gathered around to hear what attracted them to one another. “He’s cute, funny, and smart,” was the most common among women. “She’s pretty, funny, and smart,” was common among men. That’s great, and I don’t intend to sound judgmental, but really? That’s what you’re building your future on? If we’re being realistic, cats are cute, funny, and smart!
Sarah and I invited marriage mentors into our lives and subjected them to a cascade of questions! In a world where #relationshipgoals is a constant, trending topic, young minds are saturated by qualities to emulate for their marriage, for when it’s their turn.
But what are realistic, yet high standards for a rock-solid marriage?
I could create an itemized list thousands of would-be qualities that make a marriage great, but I’ve narrowed down three rock-solid qualities of a marriage built to last, that Christian couples everywhere should make their #relationshipgoals. Spoiler alert: This list does not include cute, funny, or smart:
1. Joyful, intimate friendship. I hate that “he/she is my best friend,” has become so cliché. It is a precious thing when it’s true. It is actually rarer than we realize. Strive for intimate friendship, as you look forward towards marriage. My wife truly is my go-to, my partner in crime, and my confidant. Even though we know one another extremely well, she still fascinates me. I can honestly say that there is no one else I want by my side. Yes, we disagree at times. There is not always perfect harmony, because we are two flawed, opinionated people. But at the end of the day, she is a safe place and a warm home for me.
2. Honest, loving communication. Many marriages have the “honest” part down. Remember: it’s “trendy” to speak your mind. Well, the Lord isn’t interested in you regurgitating your flawed, carnal mind to your spouse, where your words can inflict deep, heinous scars. The biblical way is to “speak the truth in love.” (Eph. 4:15) Observe and emulate couples who know the deep and hidden places of their spouse, yet choose to honor the workmanship that the Maker has wrought in them. These couple couldn’t care two cents about being right, but they have all the passion in the world to use communication to edify one another and contribute to the glorious masterpiece that God is creating in them.
3.  Dynamic, cherished partnership with the Lord. I knew a phenomenal older couple who made their morning coffee, turned on worship music, and fervently adored their Savior together. Their voices rang in worship, and tears flooded their eyes, and they were intimate friends of the Living God! Then, after spending the morning together in worship, they partnered hand in hand with God in ministry to countless broken, enslaved people. They moved in sync with God and each other. The world has seen too few of these treasured power couples, but just imagine what the world would think if married couples of this caliber were on every street!
God’s best is better than the shallow examples of the world. Let’s elevate our expectations in marriage. Let’s “come up higher” and emulate marriage God’s way.

Categories
Dating/Courting Marriage

3 Character Flaws That Are Causing Your Relationship Struggles

Couple not talking after a fight on the sofa in living room at home

Once the honeymoon stage is over, the human, flawed version of your significant other will begin to show. After looking back at arguments my husband and I had in the first year of our marriage, I began to notice some recurring roots and how they inhibited us from resolving quickly. Disagreements are going to happen, that’s a given – what matters is how you respond to them. Here are some common hindrances that are keeping you from managing conflict in a healthy way.
1.  Stubbornness
Stubbornness at its core is a pride issue. When responding with stubbornness in an argument, it is often a resistance to change and a struggle of idolizing your way or your opinion. The key to overcoming stubbornness in conflict is a healthy dose of compromise. You cannot expect your significant other to change all their habits and ways to match yours – it is unrealistic! You are two different people. Be willing to listen to what they have to say.
2.  Selfishness
Want to know how selfish you are? Get married. When you join your life with another person you begin to see how you have to make sacrifices for the health and growth of your relationship or the betterment of your family. It can be challenging when you have another person to take into consideration for all your decisions, and it is also impacted by the consequences of your actions.
 
Is not getting your way worth sitting in different rooms or enduring a long, silent car ride for hours not talking to each other? Act like an adult, own up to your mistakes, take the blame, and say sorry. Decide how you are going to move forward and prevent the situation from happening again.
 
3.  Lack of Communication/Miscommunication
Many of times I have found that the fight was started either because something was communicated/received in a way other than intended, or there was no communication, leading to a vast array of potential outcomes. One of the best lessons you will ever learn: your spouse is not a mind reader! If you want help, ask! You can’t get upset with your significant other if they had no reason to think, act, or respond otherwise. Often times women want men to “just know” that they need help with the dishes after dinner, or the laundry left over in the dryer. Men function better with direct communication instead of beating around the bush in hopes that they just “get it”.
 
If an argument is due to communication, acknowledge where the gap occurred, and develop a plan to avoid it in the future. There is no need to place fault on either party (communication is a two way street – the talker and the receiver). Just learn from it and move forward.
 
And just in case you do find yourself in a quarrel with your partner, make some non-negotiables. Here are some healthy boundaries my husband and I have in place for our marriage.  

  • Never go to bed angry or sleep in separate beds as a result of an argument.
  • Don’t involve other parties in the argument unless they are a mentor and are helping you work through it.
  • Never talk negatively about each other.
  • Don’t ever throw out the D-word (divorce).
  • Don’t hang up the phone or walk out/leave the house out of anger.

Just know, arguments are NORMAL. Take them as an opportunity to grow as a couple, and prosper a healthy relationship.  
 
Anyone else notice patterns in their relationship?
What helps you and your spouse work through the heat of an argument?
 

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Dating/Courting Home

5 Ways to Improve Communication in Your Relationship

Black couple having a conversation in their living room

We all know it , one of the areas that gets hit first in a relationship is clear communication. What Satan desires is to blur the lines of communication, having you assume but not speak and eventually begin to walk in different directions. Below are some ways to safe guard the lines of communication in your relationship.
1.  Over-communicate– Do not assume the other person knows, say it, ask it so that all parties can be on the same page.
2.  Listen with your heart– When the other person talks, listen not to answer but to hear their heart and their needs.
3.  Do not be defensive– If you feel like you need to defend yourself from your spouse, then a level of trust is missing. Watch your body language in conflict, if you feel like you are being attacked or you always have to explain, you maybe defensive.
4. Create time to talk– Communication has to be intentional, if you are really busy set weekly dates for you guys to share your highs and lows, let each person in the party share what is on their heart. Make space for communication.
5.  Learn how your partner communicates– external communicators -like to talk things out,  internal communicators-like to think things out. Learning how your spouse communicates will allow you to give them the space they need to either think or talk. Meet each other in the middle.
Remember as you grow as a couple, your communication will get stronger and stronger, but you have to intentionally practice.

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Dating/Courting Engaged Single

7 Lies to Confront Before Entering a Relationship

Portrait of a thoughtful woman looking at window
Through life’s experiences, examples around us, negative self-talk, and fear, we can easily feed into lies about relationships that consequently negatively impact the quality of our relationships. Facing them, and choosing to be set free from them before getting into a relationship will set you up for success. Here are seven common lies:
1) I’ll Be Rejected If I Put Myself Out There
There will always be a risk of rejection in relationships. Nobody wants to experience pain or heartache, but on the same level, nobody wants to be with someone that refuses to open up. If you’re not willing to deal with this lie, you’ll likely experience rejection more than if you believed that it was worth the risk.
2) I’m Not Attractive
Here’s the reality: it’s very possible that not everyone in the world finds you attractive. We are all created uniquely – we all have different personalities, we all have different interests, we are all attracted to different types of things. Along with that, the more you believe you’re attractive, the more others find you attractive. Learn to love yourself instead of waiting for others to tell you what your worth is.
3) I’m Not Enough
In what areas of your life do you feel like you’re not enough for someone to love you? If you can control those areas, choose to improve them instead of choosing hopelessness. If you can’t control them, then it’s time to let them go! You are worthy to be loved. THAT’S the truth. (Also – Jesus thought you were enough to die for. Just sayin!)
4) Marriage Will Ruin Everything
Marriage is God-created, and He doesn’t make mistakes! In instances where marriage seems to “ruin” relationships or lives, the problem is actually that the marriage wasn’t protected from the things that can wreak havoc on a covenant relationship.
5) I’ll always be__________
The problem with this lie is that it has a way of excusing oneself from self -improvement. If you convince your heart that you will always have this fill-in-the-blank issue, then it becomes less of a priority to fix. Changing your attitude about weaknesses or recurring problems can lead to becoming a healthier version of yourself!
6) I Have Commitment Problems
I hear this one a lot. I’ll admit I’m even guilty of saying this, unfortunately! In a society where you can ‘date’ without dating and be in a relationship but mask it as something less serious, it seems to be easy to avoid commitment. But there is so much beauty in choosing somebody – in deciding to commit to a person and work on a relationship instead of floating from person to person and justifying it as having ‘commitment problems’. If you want to be married, now is the time to start practicing commitment.
7) My Marriage Won’t Be Blessed Because ____
God is the Redeemer, which means there isn’t anything that He can’t redeem. Maybe you’re holding on to past mistakes, or you feel like you don’t deserve a blessed marriage, or you have failed in one way or the other. These are not good enough reasons to cancel the grace of God! He is faithful to redeem – we just need to give Him permission.
Do yourself a huge favor and start believing truths about yourself and relationships! It may take some self-checks and practice, but the quality of your future marriage is depending on it.

Categories
Dating/Courting Marriage

4 Ways to Cultivate a Culture of Intimacy In Your Relationship

Believe it or not, you are already setting the foundation of intimacy for your marriage as a dating couple. When we hear the word “intimacy”, our minds often take us directly to the physical, but true intimacy is so much more than a physical action. True intimacy is the thread that will bind you and  your mate together in every area of your marriage and hold you together when the enemy tries to destroy your union. With this being said, I want to share 4 major ways to cultivate a culture of intimacy in your dating relationship that will help you as you build the foundation of your future marriage!
1) Verbal
As men, we typically think in terms of destination, however, women think in terms of process or journey. As a man, we often think of being on a date itself as building intimacy, but for women, romance begins long before the actual date. It all begins with words for women. Verbal intimacy is the way you ask her on the date, the way you communicate your excitement to have quality time with her, the way you compliment the time she took to impress you with her appearance, and then of course the way you engage her in conversation on the date itself! Remember: LOVE UNEXPRESSED IS NOT LOVE AT ALL!!
2) Emotional 
Emotions play a major role in building a culture of intimacy. In fact, it’s impossible to separate the two. Life happens to us all at lightning speed. Often, we feel the most distant from our mates when we have the most turmoil in our families, our school, our jobs, etc.. A common  mistake we make in our relationships is sensing that our partner is acting out of character with a negative attitude and rather than diving into how they are feeling emotionally, we react with anger  and frustration which only leads to more fighting and distance between us. Remember, intimacy literally is defined as closeness and there’s no greater way to draw your partner in than by showing the person you’ve chosen to build a life with that you are truly for them and you’re going to love and care for them through any emotional state!
3) Practical 
This piece of the puzzle is instrumental. It’s the action step. Love is a verb and building a truly God-honoring intimate relationship requires action. You should ask yourself daily questions like, “What can I do to for my mate today to make them feel special?” Or “How can I serve him/her today”? We often think about the big moments when we think practical, such as birthdays, anniversaries, milestones, etc… But the practical step is the little things you do daily. Remember, every person in a relationship only wants to feel loved, respected, and cared for, and these simple “thinking of you” gestures go a long way in establishing intimacy in your relationship!
4) Spiritual
Lastly, but most importantly, the key to a truly intimate marriage is Jesus at the center of it all! We each must be following Jesus with our whole hearts, and devoted to becoming more and more like Him daily. This is the foundation that’s holds you up. When life attacks, the enemy attacks, and you’re feeling heat and pressure from all sides, it is your spiritual walk with Christ that will sustain you and lead you to a blessed and successful relationship! Remember, apart from God, we can do nothing, but through Him, we can accomplish all things!