3 Things I've Learned Since Being Married

I have been married for almost 5 months now. In this short time frame, I have learned a lot about my husband, my marriage, and myself. I want to share the top three things I’ve learned and am still learning everyday since being married with hopes of it helping you in your marriage or future marriage as well.
1. Communication. Communication. Communication.
This is very cliché but a very important aspect of marriage that we can’t ignore. We MUST communicate. First, I’ve learned to communicate about everything, even the things I may find trivial. From how our day was to our deepest fears and desires, we should communicate it with our spouse.
Secondly, I have learned we definitely have to communicate about our emotions and feelings. We can’t expect our spouse to know how we feel unless we express it to him/her. I mean your husband isn’t a mind reader. When something is wrong, say so.
Don’t make him guess and assume. The issue will never be resolved if it isn’t brought to the table. Most importantly, I have learned we must communicate respectfully and with love especially during times of conflict and disagreement
2. Comparison Kills.
It is so easy to compare our marriage with another couple’s marriage, especially due to social media. We see snippets of the good in another marriage, and we begin to think that they have the perfect marriage and perfect life together.
We think that they have a great marriage, and it very well might be, but we only see the good. Most people won’t air their dirty laundry on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter. We don’t know the struggles that they are facing behind closed doors.
We just see that her husband surprised her with a dozen roses or a weekend getaway, and then we begin to wish our husband was more like him. I’ve learned comparing your marriage to someone else’s will rob you from experiencing the beauty in your own.
3. Choose your battles. Forgive Often & Quickly.
I’ve learned everything doesn’t need to end in an argument. You shouldn’t be mad everyday because you haven’t gotten over something he did a week ago. God gives us grace and mercy daily. We should extend that same grace and mercy to our spouse, whether we feel he deserves it or not. Holding on to that grudge will hurt you more than it will hurt your spouse.
Not forgiving your spouse leads to resentment, anger, and bitterness. Love is a choice. Forgiveness is a choice. Choose love. Choose to forgive. Let go. Give it to God. He can fix the situation better than we can. And remember praying will bring about the change you want to see faster than nagging ever can.