Month: June 2014

Categories
Dating/Courting Engaged Home

Ask Dr. Faith | 22 Ways to Know if You and Your Partner Are Equally Yoked

For Christians the main thing the Father requires when we are looking for a mate is that we are equally yoked. So what does it really mean to be equally yoked? Is it simply going to church, or having a love for God? I believe there are three areas that can prove if a couple is equally yoked or not. Here are 22 ways to tell if you and your partner are equally yoked:

  1. Your understanding, passion, and love of Jesus is similar.
  2. You both have a desire to grow and propel the other towards God.
  3. You both understand and agree that God should be first in each other’s lives.
  4. You both do not feel jealous about the other’s relationship with God (in fact you encourage it).
  5. You understand one another’s vision and the role that you play in the vision.
  6. You are committed to helping the other person become all God has called them to be.
  7. You both encourage and contend for righteous living in your decisions and choices.
  8. You have similar passions whether in ministry, career, or goals.
  9. You both have at least five similar core values about faith, family, finances, and your future.
  10. You both do not allow the other to settle, but use your strengths and gifts to push each other to become better.
  11.  You can name at least three qualities in the other that you want to emulate.
  12. You understand each other’s weakness and you help correct and cover them.
  13. If courting or married, you can both convey clearly the mission and vision of your marriage.
  14. You encourage the other in there disciplines with God even if they are different from yours.
  15. You pray together.
  16. You attend supplemental spiritual, career, or marriage seminars and conferences together.
  17. You have a similar understanding of family and child rearing.
  18. You have a clear understanding of what it will take to help each other’s dreams come true.
  19. You worship God at home or in public together.
  20. You study the word of God and challenge each other in it.
  21. Your idea of success is similar.
  22. You both have a clear understanding of your roles in marriage and you can see how you both fit together.

 
 

Categories
Dating/Courting Home Marriage

Why Do I Want that Summer Body?…From a Woman's Perspective

Author: Jodi Payne

As summer approaches, I find myself getting very anxious about my outward appearance.  We have a beach trip planned and fun play dates around the pool will be scheduled.  But, all of this “fun” requires me to take off my sweat pants and XXXXL t-shirt! 
 
The great thing is that the beauty of summer does cause my body to crave more fruits and fresh salads, as well as looking forward to going to the park for trail walks and fun times on the playground.  However, summer also brings with it (for some of us) …pressure!  Pressure to “look” a certain way, to “be” a certain way, or to be a certain size.
 
I am all on board with the idea of our families getting more exercise and feeding our bodies healthier foods.  But, I have to ask myself:
 

  • Do I want to be healthier and more fit so that I can have endurance to face long, trying days?

 

  • Do I want to set a healthy example for my children?

 

  • Do I desire to help my body function as well as it can so that I will have the energy I need to fulfill my God-given calling?

 
Then I ask myself … or …
 

  • Do I desire to look a certain way to impress others?

 

  • Do I want attention drawn to my body?

 

  • Am I trying to look like someone other than who God created me to be?

 
These are simple questions, but ones that I believe have a HUGE impact on our lives.  I pray for myself, as well as other believers, that we will learn to discern our own thoughts and motives.  As we shed our winter coats and get ready to embrace a fun-filled summer, may we also remember to keep God at the center of everything!
 
“Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others…”  (Philippians 2:3)
 
“And so dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you.  Let them be a living and holy sacrifice – the kind HE will find acceptable.  This is truly the way to worship him.  Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.  THEN you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”        (Romans 12:1-2)
 

About the Author:
Jodi Payne is the wife of Beck Payne, Lead Pastor of Family Church in West Monroe, LA.  They have 3 children; Gracen, Addelyn, and Hutson.  Jodi is passionate about marriage, family, and mentoring women.

Categories
Dating/Courting Home Marriage

The Truth About a Single Woman's Confidence

To recap from my last post  in The Lady in Waiting series, Ruth was gleaning in the field of Boaz (Naomi’s relative) to secure food for her and Naomi. She was noticed by Boaz and was given much favor from him. At this point she was confused why he would take notice and give a foreigner like her such favor.
 

10 At this, she bowed down with her face to the ground. She asked him, “Why have I found such favor in your eyes that you notice me—a foreigner?”

 11 Boaz replied, “I’ve been told all about what you have done for your mother-in-law since the death of your husband—how you left your father and mother and your homeland and came to live with a people you did not know before.

(New International Version, Ruth 2:10-11)

 
Boaz didn’t care that she was a foreigner, poor, dirty etc. It wasn’t her outward appearance or status that inspired him to take notice. He was drawn to her by her reputation and the honorable things that he heard about her. She was found by Boaz because of her moral character and virtue.
 
During my late teens and early twenties, I like Ruth, did not know my full value and virtue.  I was insecure about relationships and my appearance.  When I got engaged, I could not fully commit and submit to my fiancé because of past hurt and unresolved pain. I had to do some purging, praying, fasting, and healing. I asked God to heal my heart, renew my mind, and He showed me how beautiful and virtuous I really was.
 
I was assured that my husband would love everything about me and would not hurt me. I became confident in God first and began to trust that He would not give me a husband who would hurt me. I knew that I was beautiful inside and out before my husband ever told me.
 
Your “Boaz” will want a woman that is confident in God and who she is in Him, not broken and insecure.
Ladies, please know and believe that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are his workmanship recreated in Christ Jesus. You are a good thing waiting to be found.
Your husband will love all of you, even your imperfections are perfect to him (“All of me” by John Legend is playing in my head right now) ;))
Your Abba Father wants to give you a man that will cherish and adore you. Cast down those insecure dark thoughts and be the woman He has called you to be; A virtuous, beautiful, strong, and God fearing woman!

 On behalf of Married and Young, I will be blessing someone with this book. In order to enter into the drawing you have to do two things:

  1. Follow Married and Young on Facebook

  2. Commented on at least one of the 4 posts of the Lady in Waiting Series on Married and Young

 

Categories
Engaged Marriage

The Forgotten Link for a Godly Marriage

My wife and I have magnanimous goals we believe God has given us as a couple to accomplish.  After getting married we discussed our passions and goals in order to better understand why God brought us together, and to be able to push each other to achieve them.
 
Many couples marry without truly having the discussion of “Why did God bring us together?”.  Yes, to love one another, but also to love one another to action.  That action involves fulfilling the purpose of God for your life.  We knew if our goals were accomplishable on our own then they weren’t big enough.  We set goals that require God’s empowering in order to accomplish it. That empowering in the bible is called, “the anointing”. The anointing is God’s presence empowering you by way of the Holy Spirit.
 
Depending on your church background, the term, “anointing” can mean different things based upon how your church taught it.  Most attribute it to a preacher preaching, or a singer singing, but when it comes to our every day tasks we do not embrace the concept of being anointed for something.  Biblically the anointing was used to set a person apart for a specific reason or purpose.
 Jesus states in Luke 4:18 , “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, He has ANOINTED me to preach the gospel, heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and the blind will see, and the oppressed will be set free.”
We find in this passage of scripture Jesus was ANOINTED, which means empowered by the Spirit of God to do specific things.  God has called you and your spouse to dream big dreams, and to accomplish much for His glory.  It is with the empowerment of God’s anointing that you will do those things.  A godly marriage must have the anointing to see the plan of God fulfilled in their lives.
Here are 5 questions to help you discover why your marriage needs to have God’s anointing.

  1. What are the dreams you and your spouse have that require God to see it fulfilled?
  2. What do you and your spouse love to do for others?
  3. What is your strategy in your children’s life in regards to preparing them for their purpose?
  4. What are the top conflicts/issues affecting your marriage?
  5. What do you want to be known for when you leave this life?