Confessions Of A Virgin

 
Guest Writer: Daphney Marc
For as long as I can remember, I’ve always subconsciously treated my body like a prized possession and I’ve never felt comfortable wearing clothing that over exposed. When picking out an outfit, I usually have a coverage ratio; meaning If my arms are bare my legs must be covered and vice versa.
I’m not sure where it stems from, but I consider it a blessing, and I take pride in treating my body like a temple as the Bible states in Corinthians 6:19-20 “Do you know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.”
Some may call it being “conservative,” but it’s a contributing factor to why I’ve decided to remain a virgin until marriage.
Now, being a virgin is something incredibly rare these days, especially at the age of 27. But, from the time I was a teen I made a decision that I was going to wait.
I did have momentary thoughts of “maybe if I don’t find the one by the time I’m 25, then maybe it will be okay… cause at the point mostly everyone has done it.”
However, waiting is ultimately a value of mine, and I wish that society placed more emphasis on waiting instead of it being something considered bizarre, or that is limited to the prudish few who are most likely waiting for religious purposes.
Although I am proud that I haven’t succumbed to temptation, it’s not something that I go around telling people. But, on the rare occasions that I do, it is usually reciprocated with “Oh wow that takes a lot of discipline, how do you do it?” Or “Good luck!”  And my personal favorite, “Don’t you want to test drive the car before you buy it?”  Regardless of people’s views, it’s a value that I cherish even more so after my first relationship, ironically.
I actually didn’t get into my first relationship until I was well into my 20’s with a guy that I thought I was going to marry. Prior to having met me he was sexually active, but he respected my views on premarital sex and agreed to wait. He had a lot of great qualities, but I quickly realized those qualities were not enough to sustain a relationship.
Although I was the one who decided to end things, I was still distraught by the break up.  As with any heartbreak, it is especially hard when you’ve opened up to the person, shown vulnerability, affection, and truly believed that you would be with the person forever.  It took me a prolonged amount of time to get over that relationship, so I can’t imagine how I would have felt had I given my body to the relationship as well. Thank goodness that my values and fear of God were able to overpower my temptation; it saved me so to speak.
We live in a day and age where there’s such a high emphasis placed on sex; its everywhere, making maintaining a life of sexual purity as hard as keeping a child away from a cookie jar. Even though we are constantly bombarded with sex, we should not be overcome by the ways of the world as scripture states in Romans 12:2: “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is— his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
And who wouldn’t agree that sex is more enjoyable when it is with someone you genuinely care about? And,  how much better when it is with someone you have vowed to spend the rest of your life with, as it states in Ecclesiastes 9:9 “Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun— all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.”
I believe if our society viewed sex as a sacred act, then not only would there be better physical health,  as there are 20 million new sexually transmitted infections that develop each year in the U.S .,  but our hearts would be more open, and we would be emotionally healthier when entering into a new relationship. People tend to bring forth a lot of personal baggage from previous relationships; wounds that have not fully healed that taint our views. The average person gets into about 5 relationships before they find the right person to marry; sharing your body with that many wrong suitors just seems emotionally scarring, especially for women. So, it’s best the marriage bed be kept pure; as it states in Hebrews 13:4.
With all that being said, no matter how often promiscuity is put on display, I consider my virginity to be a gift to the one who deserves it. So, I will continue to wait for the man I will marry, and maybe, just maybe, he is waiting for me too.
 
 

Biography: Daphney  Marc is from Orlando,  a graduate of the University of Central Florida , and works in education. She holds a Bachelor of Arts degree in Sociology and a Graduate Certificate in Public Administration. She has served at her local children’s church ministry and taught in grade schools for over 10 yrs. She also has experience working as a Therapeutic Mentor for young women, and is a lifestyle blogger for her own personal brand BEFAKEFREE which promotes the importance of living a life of authenticity.  She enjoys music, exercising, cooking, spending time with family and friends, and most of all living for God’s Glory.