3 Ways to Stop Making Marriage an Idol

Guest Writer: Taylor Banks
I remember the first time the Lord began speaking to me about my future spouse; it was through a dream. I woke up the next morning completely in shock. I seriously questioned if I saw and heard everything in the dream until the Lord began confirming the dream repeatedly in the year after. After the shock and some fear of what the Lord showed me began to wear off – I became extremely excited and OBSESSED. Like many girls and young women, I’ve dreamed about my future wedding, watched Say Yes to the Dress, Platinum weddings, My Fair Wedding etc. I always knew I wanted to get married but now that the Lord was talking to me about it – it felt more real. I could not stop thinking about who the person was, when they were going to come, how we would meet etc. It began to completely take over my thoughts.
One day I was studying Exodus 20 and the Lord completely wrecked me. I didn’t see my thoughts as an idol because marriage is god ordained. However, I realized that even things that are pleasing to God can be perverted by humanity if we put it above God. Once I realized what I had done, I quickly repented and became determined to change my thoughts. It was not easy but here are three things ways to stop making marriage an idol.

1. Stop watching wedding shows. Ladies, I know how tempting it can be to want to watch all these wedding shows. I myself love all things weddings – the dress, the venue, flowers etc. I deliberately had to stop watching them because they triggered me thinking about what I would do with my own wedding. Those thoughts triggered me thinking constantly on who I would be marrying which led to thinking about what we do in ministry together. While these things are not bad in itself, they have its designated time to be considered and it’s not during the single season.
2. Memorize scriptures. I came up with key scriptures to deflect my thoughts about weddings and marriage. When something triggered a thought, I began to quote the scripture in my head until the thought had subsided. Key scriptures that I used are: 1 John 5:21, Proverbs 4:23, Psalm 63:3-4, 2 Corinthians 10:5, Psalm 25:4-5, and Psalm 91:2. Meditating on these scriptures kept me focused on the main thing – Jesus!
3. Pray and fast. Doing the first two steps without these would have been pointless. When you combine these two practices it helps to discipline you and bring the flesh under subjection. Without prayer and fasting you would be trying to overcome yourself with yourself. Prayer and fasting keeps you connected to the ultimate source of your strength, hope, and will – Jesus Christ.

If reading this has convicted to you, know that because Christ is living within you, you have the power to overcome any distracting and obsessive thought!
 

www.taylormadem.com
Taylor Banks is a native of Long Island, New York where she lives with her parents and younger sister. In January of 2014 the Lord began giving her titles for blog posts. After believing she would only be contributing these writings to other websites, the Lord instructed her to start her own site. Taylor is committed to encouraging young women to live a life in TOTAL submission unto Christ. Her insight culminates from personal experience and through observing the lives of many around her. It is her prayer that this blog encourages readers to go after God with all their heart, mind, and soul.
Taylor is a licensed minister and an active member at Refuge Apostolic Church of Christ in Freeport, NY. She recently completed her Masters degree in Social Work at Fordham University. In May of 2016 she will complete her Master’s degree in Divinity at New York Theological Seminary. Upon completion of her clinical social work license she aspires to start a private practice providing therapy to those suffering from trauma. In addition, she plans to open a community center. Through the community center she hopes to be able to assist individuals in making personal changes and be involved in local politics to help create a better society that will empower people to succeed academically, socially, spiritually and financially.