The Right Way to Guard Your Heart

I believe we have made relationships with the opposite sex harder than they should be. We have taken this scripture (Proverbs 4:23) completely out of context.
 
Here are 2 reasons we have been guarding our hearts wrong and 2 ways to set you free from that:
 
1.Instead of guarding our hearts, we build huge walls between us and the opposite sex.
Let me set you free. Stop acting like every guy is a possible date mate, or every gal thinks you are pursing them if you say hi. Having this mindset sets us up for failure in marriage. We need to practice having good healthy relationships with the opposite sex now, because when we get married, we are not just going to have friends of the same sex. The main reason we struggle with this is because we do not have pure motives. We should start looking at them as brothers and sisters, not as potential date mates.
 
2.We use the phrase “we are just friends” to guard our hearts
As singles, we decide how much time we spend with every person in our lives. It’s not like anybody is waiting for us at home. However, I am afraid that some of us take the context “it’s ok to be friends with the opposite sex” way too out of hand.  If we spend too much time with that person, I assure you it will turn into something else.  One always ends up liking the other, mainly because you are sharing your heart and giving this person more time than you should.
If you have been spending too much time with your “best friend” (of the opposite sex), then this is where the guarding your heart part comes in handy.  It doesn’t mean you completely have to cut the relationship off, it just means that you will have to come up with some practical boundaries. Unless this person has communicated with you that they have feelings for you, then you have no business hanging out with them 24/7.
 
So which one is it? First you say we must have friendships of the opposite sex, and then you say be careful. Exactly! We need to have spiritual brothers and sisters in our lives. But, we need to do it wisely. Just yesterday I opened a letter from one of my best friends, Tucker that he wrote to me on his birthday telling me how much he appreciates our friendship and encouraging me. Which by the way, he is dating another one of my best friends, Sarah Beth. My point is, his motives were completely pure. It is possible, ladies and gentlemen. It is possible to have guy friends and see them as brothers. It is possible to have girls as friends and see them purely like sisters.
 
So I say all this to say, don’t be that awkward guy that is scared to talk to girls and only hangs out with the guys, or that guy that only talks to certain girls to only date them. Ladies, don’t give guys the cold shoulder. The Bible says, “Be kind to one another,” it doesn’t say only be kind with people of the same sex. So,why do we think that we can be selective with our kindness? Being kind with men will not come off as liking them!
 
We are all guilty of this, but we can all be set free. If you have an issue with this, I would bring it to the Lord and ask him to give you a heart for both men and women, and to seek every relationship with pure motives.